I went to a small high school, and the dating pool was limited to say the least. At UNC, there are a lot more fish in the sea, but I don’t know what to do to woo one. (I am not a huge party person.) – Floundering Fisherman
He Said:
Dear Floundering Fisherman,
I’m going to have to sympathize with you on this one. I also went to a small high school, and I would have to agree that going from a very limited dating pool to being in a gigantic population of college students can be quite daunting.
But, that hasn’t stopped me from reeling in the ladies since I’ve been here, and today is your lucky day. I’m going to share my tips for how you can go about finding the right guy for you. This list has been edited since you aren’t a “huge party person.” And about that: come on, that’s the easiest way — you’re only making things harder for yourself:
(1) Hanging out in the library for some people is beneficial to their GPA, but for you, let’s think of it as finding a special someone. If you like smart guys, here’s your shot. Libraries can actually be great for socializing — sorry nerds. Sitting at a table across from a guy, making eye contact and maybe slipping him a note can get you very far. The probability of this working out is significantly less than going to a party, but it is a little more coy of an approach.
(2) Another good option would be finding a club or organization that you are really interested in and becoming a regular at their events. Where better of a place to meet a potential boyfriend than celebrating an activity or cause that you are both passionate about. Becoming a staple at these events will give you the appearance that you really care about something and that you can commit to these events — which will only help you in the long-run.
(3) Okay, so I know you said you don’t do parties, but honestly your options are getting slim. How about you and your suitemates/roommates throw a party. This would be good because you’d be the host and you’d be in charge, things that should hopefully make you feel a little more comfortable. Invite all the cute guys you know from class and tell them they can bring friends. This will give you the leg up because you’ll be seen as a really socialite and it could make you stand out in the crowd.
Take these to heart and have some fun.
HCXO, He said
She Said:
Dear Floundering Fisherman,
I think the fact that you are trying to “woo” a guy says it all. There’s no need to try and reel a guy in like a fish on a fish pole, just let one come along.
I’ve said this before, but the second you stop looking for your prince charming, the right guy will come along. That’s why he’s called prince CHARMING. It’s hard to be charmed if you are expecting it.
My mom always said that you can’t love someone else before you love yourself, and I completely agree. I would work on being happy with just you without a boy standing by your side. Once you feel confident with that, I’m sure the guys will start rolling in. Beig
I understand you’re not a big party person. I think that’s great. I have a theory that you can’t start a valuable relationship at a bar or a party anyways. But, you are going to have to put yourself out there if you ever want to meet…anyone. Whether it’s joining a new club, going to a party and just not getting “wild” or just trying to make new friends, you are going to have to put yourself out there in some way, shape or form in order to meet guys.
The right guy WILL come along.
HCXO, She said