Let’s be real, when the temperature falls below 40 degrees, no one really wants to be left alone in the cold. It seems that this time of the year for single people is an unwelcome reminder that you are, indeed, still single. For those in committed relationships, this time of the year servesas a romantic and blissful season free from trials and tribulations, other than the quest to find the perfect Christmas gift.
That being said, many relationships in college tend to be strangely undefined. It is not as simple as Facebook’s “single” or “in a relationship” option. And the “it’s complicated” or “in an open relationship” options are socially unacceptable, terrible ideas. In our parents’ and grandparents’ generations, there seemed to be less gray area in the love department: you were dating or you were not dating.
Our new, ambiguous approach to dating has its pros and cons. In some ways, the pressure and stress of being in a serious relationship can be avoided by “hanging out” or “talking.” However, the problems arise when the two parties are not on the same page; one person expects more of the other, causing constant heartache and disappointment. Although it would be impossible to list all of the relationship possibilities on college campuses today, here are a few examples of types of couples these days:
The Hook-up Buddies
These two only interact roughly between the hours of 10 p.m. and 10 a.m., most likely on a Thursday, Friday or Saturday. You will never find them spending time together during the middle of the day, especially in public. The relationship consists of late-night texts, booty calls and tip-toeing out the door the next morning. This is an ideal situation for some–you can keep your freedom and, atthe same time, rest assured that your nights will not be lonely.
The Just-Don’t-Like-Being-Single Couple
Every now and then a couple comes along and everyone asks, “Why are they even together?” They seem bored, don’t seem to haveanything in common and frankly don’t act like they like each other at all. If a couple has been together for a long time, going separate ways can be a foreign and scary concept. While they may never have fun together, they find comfort in the title. They may often clog your News Feed with pictures or statuses including the phrase “my boyfriend,” just in case you forgot they had one.
The Married Couple
Everyone knows one of these couples. These two are constantly attached at the hip and seemingly cannot go through life without the other person right next to them. At times, they may also be guilty of excessive amounts of PDA. This couple withstands all types of adversity that a college relationship faces; they are in it for the long haul. Some may cringe at the mere thought of such a commitment, but for others it is ideal.
The Kinda-Together Couple
A step up from the hook-up buddies, these couples are quite common. They are either in the beginning stages of a blossoming relationship, or they choose to remain in an eternal state of “we’re together, but we’re not NOT together.” They hang out frequently but are fearful of putting a title on things. Although there may be real feelings involved, the pair may be used to the perks of the single life and are hesitant to abandon their old ways.
It is hard to say what a “normal” relationship is anymore, but if what you are doing makes you happy, then normal may not be necessary. It may be helpful to take a critical look at your own situation and assess what you are looking for out of the relationship. If your significant other is causing you more grief than happiness, it may be time to say no to the ambiguous relations.
Sources:
Couple in bed (photo): http://www.iamstaggered.com/usa/files/2011/06/1201-couple-in-bed_at.jpg
Wife and groom (photo): http://allisondawnpr.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/married-couple-…
Girl on back (photo):http://www.goodenoughmother.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Teenage_coupl…
Couple on beach (photo): http://www.profimedia.si/photo/teenage-couple-17-19-sitting-on-beach-hol…