Starting fresh in a new city or stepping onto a new campus can feel like standing in the middle of a crowded room where everyone already knows each other, except you. It’s exciting, overwhelming, and honestly a little intimidating. But here’s the truth: making friends in a new environment isn’t as impossible as it feels. Most people around you are also hoping to find their people; they’re just waiting for someone to make the first move.
Whether you just moved into your apartment, are starting at an HBCU, or are navigating a new semester on unfamiliar ground, here are some gentle but powerful ways to build genuine friendships and create your community.
1. Start Showing Up Even If It’s Awkward at First
You don’t have to be the loudest person in the room to make connections. Half the battle is simply showing up. Go to campus events, club meetings, study groups, and interest meetups. Even if you feel a little uncomfortable walking in alone, remember: everyone else is likely feeling the same way.
Consistency makes you familiar, and familiarity turns into friendships.
2. Lead With Small Conversations
Friendships don’t usually begin with deep emotional confessions; they start with small talk. Compliment someone’s outfit, ask a classmate where they’re from, or spark a conversation about the professor’s confusing assignment.
These little interactions open the door to bigger ones. It may feel simple, but small talk is the first step toward finding your people.
3. Get Involved in What Genuinely Interests You
You don’t have to sign up for every organization on campus, choose the ones aligned with what you enjoy. Love fitness? Join a campus fitness group. Into fashion, STEM, media, dance, or volunteering? There’s a club for that.
When you join spaces that align with your interests, you naturally meet people with shared passions. Those are the friendships that last.
4. Be Open, But Don’t Force Anything
Some friendships click instantly. Others take time. And some connections simply aren’t meant to last, and that’s okay. Be open, warm, and friendly, but let things evolve naturally. Forced friendships rarely feel good.
Focus on the people who make you feel comfortable, supported, and appreciated.
5. Use Your City as a Conversation Starter
If you’re in a brand-new city, use it to your advantage. Explore cute cafés, hidden gems, or local events and invite people along. A simple:
“I’m trying to find new spots in the city, want to come with me?”
…can turn into a whole new friendship era.
6. Don’t Be Afraid to Make the First Move
Being “the one who reaches out” isn’t embarrassing, it’s brave. Send the text. Start the group chat. Invite someone to study, grab food, or go to a campus event.
Most people want friends; they just don’t want to seem too eager. Be the one who breaks the ice.
7. Give Yourself Time to Adjust
You won’t find your whole circle the first week, and that’s normal. Real friendships grow as you settle in, open up, and let people in. Give yourself grace. You’re navigating a huge transition, and your people will come, piece by piece.
Final Reminder
Making friends in a new place doesn’t require being perfect, popular, or extra outgoing. It only requires being open, kind, and consistent. Your community is out there, you just have to give them the chance to find you.