Let’s get down to business. You’re done with your old boo. Block, delete, ignore. It’s all been done. Now what? Do you cry in a corner or do you find a new boo right away? Let’s talk about it.
It starts with you. You’ve spent a lot of time focused on that person, now is the time to get deep into yourself and work on the important things in life. This isn’t to say that you should neglect yourself when you’re involved with someone, but if you have all of this free time, why not put all of that extra time into yourself?
What does “focusing on yourself” include? Pampering, refocusing your energy, picking up new habits. Now that you don’t spend your late nights on the phone with your boo, you can invest that time treating yourself to nice things like face masks and private Netflix and chill sessions. You can pick up a few self help books such as What I Know for Sure by our sis Oprah Winfrey, or The Power of Positive Listening by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale. Also, you can check out some really cool Ted Talks such as Get Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable by Luvvie Ajayi. Ted Talks, or other motivational chats, help me stay a bit more positive when I’m feeling at my lowest. Personally, I haven’t been in a relationship in a long time, but when I feel like I’m still stuck on the last guy I’ve given my time to, I become sad and lack motivation.
Next, let’s talk about the biggest issue in these scenarios: the back and forth. This is also known as “Games We Play.” Yup, you might’ve experienced this if you’ve unblocked your ex-boo’s number and hit them up or allowed them to convince you to stop by their house. Let’s talk about how toxic this is to our healing process-seriously, what are we expecting when we decide to speak to our old boo again? Do we think that they’ve changed or that the time a part has created a brand new person? Yeah, I know it’s hard but that relapse in our healing process is causing nothing but more drama in our lives. Keep pushing through that healing process and try to stay away from that unblock button. When we’re feeling like we need to speak to that person, try to do things that will keep your mind off of that person. Complete some daily tasks such as taking a shower or cleaning your room. Or, you can relax and maybe contact a person that puts you in a more positive head space.
That’s all for now. Like my sis, Cardi B says, ”Look myself in the mirror, I say we gon’ win. Knock me down nine times but I get up ten.”