It’s game time ladies! The season is changing and it’s getting colder, which means we’ve officially hit cuffing season and by now, most of us have been drafted. In the begining of every season women typically look for the following top 5 qualities in a “bae”: easy on the eyes (attractive), well-mannered, working towards an aspiration, intelligent, and most of all kind-hearted. As the pre-season stage comes to an end, some women fall head over heels for their bae, while others are simply trying to define the relationship. However time is ticking and the holidays are around corner, so its time to get real and ask yourself: Are you being tricked or treated?
Tricked /trik.ed/ – For the purposes of this article, the term is in reference to being “played”, which means you’re wasting your time and its time to go!
Treated /tret.ed/ – For the purposes of this article, the term is an action in how your bae treats you. Yes, so stop analyzing the situation and realize you have a good person, who is interested in you and laughs at your corny jokes. They also,love and respect your mind, body, and soul, so don’t run them away.
Ok ladies, so it’s game time and you’re halfway through the season. Before making the decision to take your significant other home for the holidays to meet grandma, you must ask yourself a few questions:
How does he act towards you in public?
Tricked- Do you ever get the feeling that you’re just a secret? They tell you that keeping the relationship private and not showing any relation of knowing each other will make the relationhip drama-free, well they’re WRONG! As most relationships in college promote privacy, do not allow yourself to fall victim of being in a one-sided relationship by believing that your “bae”only wants to keep the drama out of your lives. Listen to your guts, cause you’re being tricked!
Treated- They show their appreciation towards you in words and gestures in more ways than one and give you winks, hugs, and smiles in the public eye. Nevertheless, its not enough public display of affection (PDA) to you, so you believe the relationship is headed towards Splitsville. DO NOT WORRY! Your boo likes you girl and trust us,everyone who is important to him is more than aware of your existence. They just rather keep unnecessary stress away from your relationship!
How do they feel about you looking at their phone?
Tricked- The age old question that many women ask in regards to a phone, ” If you are not doing anything wrong, why can’t I see your phone?” Yes, we are gulity for asking this question too, but if you have tingly feeling that your partner is hiding something, DO NOT ignore that feeling. If your partner questions your concerns or motives about looking through their phone and it turns into a week long argument, it’s time to let the relationship go!
Treated- As the old saying goes, “If you go looking for something, you’ll find something you were’nt looking for in the first place.” In our generation, a phone is the one device that’s by our side 24/7 and holds all the secrets of our life…all of our secrets, so that’s why sharing passcodes are a given right in a relationship. If your partner has earned your trust without thoughts of infidelities in the relationship,do not go searching for a problem or develop an issue to ease your mind that he’s Mr. Wrong. If everything is going smoothly, go with the flow!
When you have a suspicion do they get defensive?
As you converse your suspicions does he get upset or want to ignore you because he says you are overreacting? Or does he hear you out and genuinely care in order to stop your insecurities? When most start this conversation it can be very irritating especially if nothing is really occurring, however if a significant other has a suspicion it is something bothering them from a certain relationship that the other person notices and must be confronted. If your significant other becomes defensive and aggressive about the topic, you might be getting tricked however if it is a reoccurring topic in which your significant other has already proven that nothing is going on, then there may be a justification for them becoming angry. The bottom line here is to remember never assume, find evidence and ask questions before coming to a conclusion. You may have a good man who is genuinely treating you right and because of your own insecurities getting in the way, you are letting go sight of positives by creating negatives.
While there are more indicators in which you should ask yourself as the relationship develops into something more, do not limit yourself to the above questions. We are young and relationships are a huge responsibility that requires TWO PEOPLE to compromise and learn from one another, so don’t go rushing into a relationship just becasue you want a cuddy buddy this season. Remember you’re half-way through the season, which means you still have time for a last mintue replacement pick if you’re being tricked. Hurry though! The key is to be happy and know your worth ladies, so please take these tips into consideration and enjoy the holidays.
Let the cuffing season COMMENCE!