Throughout my entire life, almost all of my close friends have been women. On top of that, I was raised by mostly women. And the relationships I’ve cultivated with the women in my life have been filled with times of misunderstanding, challenges to my perspective, and ultimately, some of the most comforting connections I’ve experienced. No matter my relationship status, I’ll always want to be surrounded by a core group of women that I not only trust, but that I enjoy spending time with.
So why is it so important to have a close group of girlfriends in your life?
Your partner can’t be your everything.
I grew up thinking that your partner should be an all-encompassing best friend and romantic interest, all wrapped into one perfect-for-you person. I’ve quickly realized that no matter how good of a match your partner is, they will never be able to understand every side of you there is. They might not always give you the exact right advice that you want to hear, and they might not be able to be the impartial perspective you need. It’s healthy to have a multitude of relationships in your life, giving you a more well-rounded support system. Sometimes you’ll want someone different than your partner to vent to, shop with, or laugh with.
There’s something powerful about women coming together.
I feel that, especially as I was growing up, I felt the need to compete with the female friends I had around me. I blame a lot of this on the way the media has portrayed women in such a way that they’re constantly being pitted against each other. Oftentimes, women in media are being compared regarding their looks, who they’ve dated, and who’s more well-liked. However, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that it’s important to embrace your own individuality, and that of others. There’s nothing like having strong friendships with women who genuinely root for you and who believe in you.
No one better understands your experiences as a woman.
My friends understand what it’s like to feel the utter shame & disgust I feel when being cat-called. They get the physical toll our bodies go through every month, and what it takes to power through that when you have responsibilities. And they get what it’s like to feel undermined at times, just because you’re of a certain gender. It’s a comfort to have people around you who can actually relate to your experiences firsthand.
And finally…
No one will be there for you like your girls will.
At every pivotal moment of my life, one of my closest friends has been standing there beside me. If I needed someone to talk things through with, if I needed a place to stay, if I needed to cry or be distracted, there has been a loyal girlfriend there by my side. There’s a sisterhood in female friendship that can last a lifetime. It’ll never be perfect, but it will carry you through both the good times and bad.
I feel safer having the friends that I have in my life, because I know that I can count on them to have my back. And I only hope to continue to make more of these kinds of relationships for as long as I can. I hope you’ve had the luck of experiencing these relationships as well. And if you haven’t, there is always time to open yourself up to some new possible connections!