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My Discovery of Self-Inspiration While Dealing With Chronic Illness

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Carleton chapter.

For so long I have been focused on what I believed it meant to be to be inspiring.

Even as I was living through hell, I attempted to remain stoic, believing holding my story close to my chest, not allowing others to see the pain, was the very thing that made me brave. So often in my own life I found myself alone, scared that if I had extended my hand for help, no one would have reached back.

I was so intent on seeming inspiring that I pressed forward, ignoring all the signs that maybe it was time to admit that things weren’t alright. To me, to admit that the journey was difficult wasn’t stoic, and to admit that I needed help was weak. Today I was speaking to someone who gently reminded me that vulnerability is bravery too. 

Inviting someone into your pain is actually incredibly beautiful and courageous. Sharing the truth is actually more inspiring than choosing to hide it. It’s okay to have difficult days, days in which our faith wavers. Days in which we feel like giving up. It’s alright to be tired.

What makes individuals inspiring is they continue to persevere even as the water rises. Your journey, all of it–the pain, the sadness, the shame, the fear, the joy, the triumph, the victory–all of it is important. Maybe whoever you are sharing your story with is going through their own struggle.

By sharing your fight, you actually invite others to look to you for strength, as you are still here to tell of the battle you walked through or are currently walking through. Being vulnerable, with the right people, actually fosters healthy relationships, of honesty and truth.

Every single part of your journey is part of what makes you such an important and incredible person. You deserve to be able to share every single chapter.  

Ella Berman

Carleton '22

Ella loves writing about health, wellness and people. In her spare time she can be found playing the ukulele, writing songs, painting or praising Jesus.