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Cal State Chico | Life > Experiences

How Families Form Friendships

Julia Cowperthwaite Student Contributor, California State University - Chico
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal State Chico chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Growing up in a large or small family has always been known to shape the kind of person that you are. People constantly get asked if they’re “the middle child” or if they have any siblings at all. This has been going on since the dawn of time. The most interesting thing is seeing how our friendships form and have been changed through the connections that we feel within our own families. The most interesting thing is seeing how people interact outside of their families based on these roles that they take on. 

Personally, I have three siblings, I am the oldest middle child. Growing up with an older sister, I always wanted to make sure that I was following the right trends, acting the right way, and honestly just wanted to make sure that I was cool enough to hang out with her. In my current friendships, I feel like I constantly am trying to make sure that my friends like my outfits and that we are talking about things like current clothing trends, what’s going on in pop-culture, etc. 

Being an older sister to two little brothers is also something that completely changed the way that I act as a friend too. Going through your teenage years asking an older sister for relationship advice is something that I always cherished, but having a little brother ask me about girl advice was something that completely changed the way that I give advice to friends too.

Before my siblings were old enough, it was also all “girly” advice and making sure that I was supporting the women’s perspective and the “maneater” stereotypes. When my brother became a teenager, I started to see the other side of how sometimes girls can be completely in the wrong and not understand what a guy is going through. 

Through being an older sibling, it made me realize that maybe girls need to have more guy friendships to go to for this kind of information. It was completely eye opening and flooded a huge wave of new questions towards my friendships. 

Being a middle child has shaped who I am as a person, but being an only child or the oldest child still has a massive impact on the way that friendships are formed and carried. Your home life shapes the ways that you interact with others and the world for that matter. 

Only children often get a bad wrap for being “entitled” or “spoiled”. This comes from having your parents constantly waiting on you. What people don’t usually associate with this feeling is the loneliness that comes with it. Having siblings allows you to basically have a trial run at friendships and how to maintain them.

Billie Eilish, Sabrina Carpenter, and Chappell Roan hug during the grammys 2025
Francis Specker/CBS ©2025 CBS Broadcasting

Friendships that form through sisterly bonds are ones that can be cherished for lifetimes too. Many of my peers have found their bonds through joining clubs and sororities! Through joining organizations on a college campus, you can find such an amazing group of supportive people who are willing to do whatever they can to be that support system that you might be craving. 

charli xcx performing at the 2025 grammys
Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2025 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved

It doesn’t matter if you’re wanting to find your sister, future bridesmaids, best friend, or shoulder to cry on, it’s easier to find those friends by just putting yourself out there regardless of how you think your family background might define you. The older you get the easier it is to grow out of that mindset of being stuck in a family role.

Friendships are meant to be uplifting and prove that your are more than where you came from. That doesn’t mean that our families don’t help the ways that we interact with others, but it also doesn’t mean that it has to be the only way that we find who we are in our new roles entering life!

Julia Cowperthwaite

Cal State Chico '26

Julia Cowperthwaite is known for being light hearted and fun. She enjoys cooking and loves to be around her friends in her spare time. She's a complete extrovert and can be found near others talking about any topic under the sun more often than not. Going for long walks around town are also high up on her list of favorite things to do along with getting a great cup of coffee from new local places.

She's from the Bay Area,CA and goes for long drives with her friends for fun while home. Upon moving to Chico State for college, she joined the College of Business to work on a bachelor's degree in Marketing. Julia also joined the Delta Iota chapter of Sigma Kappa while being at Chico State, where she held the Vice President of Finance position for the chapter from 2024-2025.

Julia also holds a job at Little Red Hen Lifespan Center, where she works with children with autism. She loves helping the kids and interacting with them through her work.