Ah, the holiday season – you love coming home for some delicious home-cooked meals, the comfort of your old bed and being surrounded by the familiar faces of your family. But brace yourself: you are about to be bombarded with questions about your new and exciting collegiate experience.
Don’t worry, it’s all done out of love, and it’s just hard for your family to adjust to not being involved in every part of your life anymore. But as a precaution, arm yourself before your annual Thanksgiving dinner or gift exchange with these survival tips for the top five questions you will be asked over and over.
1. Are you dating anyone?
The traditional family pastime during the holidays: let’s play Who Are You Dating with our college student! Unless you’re in a long term, steady relationship, this is a tricky and frankly awkward question. You’re not about to explain the grisly dynamics of the college hookup culture to Great Auntie Susan, and you don’t want to admit to Grandpa that the cutie next to you in your psych lecture with whom you thought you had a connection with hasn’t texted you back in over a week.
The truth is that traditional relationships are generally scarce on college campuses; you’ll probably meet a lot of people and go through a lot of phases before you start thinking about settling down. Keep your answers vague when talking to your family, like “I’ve met a lot of really nice people!” or “I went to a formal with a cool guy from my building!” Any little bit of information should be enough to satiate them, and you’ll have dodged that bullet before they move on to question #2.
2. What are you planning on doing after college?
The annoyance level of this question depends slightly on your major. For example, if you’re studying Construction Management, you’ve got a pretty easy answer ready. But for the Business, English and Philosophy majors out there, this question can be the trigger for a mini panic attack. Chances are you’ve got your life planned out through the end of the week, tops. You’ve got a couple ideas about things you’re passionate about and interested in, but definitely not a job description to articulate them.
Surprisingly, I’ve found it’s actually best to just be honest about this one. Explain to your family that you love working with kids, or giving back to the community, or telling a story through art, but you’re not sure how to apply these things to your major. The great thing about most of your extended family is that they’ve all had to apply to jobs too. Generally they’ve got some good advice up their sleeves and aren’t here to lecture you. And just wait, after four years in your major with tons of great experiences under your belt, you’ll surprise them all by doing greater things than they ever dreamed you’d do.
3. Are you eating well?
This probably isn’t the time to admit how weird your college eating habits are and put unnecessary worry on your family’s shoulders. Sure, last week you had cold pizza for breakfast and pretzels and nutella for dinner, so what? This is the first time in your life you’ve had to feed and take care of yourself, so cut yourself some slack. You are still just learning how to be an adult and that skill will take years and years worth of grocery store runs to finally perfect. Maybe next time you’re at the market pick up a few fruits or vegetables and see where that takes you. You’ll get there eventually.
4. How are your classes?
College classes are vastly different from high school, and your parents might be used to checking in on your grades and making sure you’ve done your assignments. You’re probably not used to only attending a few classes a day and having long chapters of reading to do instead of homework worksheets. Just assure your family that you’re learning a lot in your classes and that you’re staying on top of everything. You’ll make the adjustment to college curriculum slowly but surely, just hopefully in time for your quarter grades to come out!
5. What do you do for fun on the weekends?
For this question, I’d advise you to stick to emphasizing how many new friends you’ve made and how much fun you have meeting new people. You don’t have to give details about how crazy the party scene may be or how late you and your friends stay out. As long as you are staying safe and taking care of yourself, that’s all you need to worry about. We’ve all got cringe-worthy moments in college that we’ll take to the grave with us.