When I was younger, I was always self-conscious about what everyone thought of me, something so many people are. Questions arise in our heads: Am I wearing the right clothes? Am I listening to the right music? Do I like the right celebrities? I remember sitting on the school bus in middle school and hiding my iPod from the other students so they wouldn’t know I owned the entire High School Musical discography. All I cared about was being seen as cool, even if that meant hiding what I actually loved.
As I started high school, I still felt pressure to like certain things, and dislike others. I tried to pretend that all I loved was underground indie rock groups and alternative bands, where, in reality, I was constantly jamming to One Direction’s first album. Admitting it to friends was embarrassing. Before they hit it big, no one knew who I was talking about. I would need to explain how they’re a boy band, and then the judgements started. It wasn’t “cool” to listen to a boy band in high school, I was “too old” for it. Because of this, I would counteract the pop songs on my iPod with something people perceived as interesting, like a new alternative track. I spent so much time and effort trying to come across as cool and aloof, but all I could think about was how I felt like a fraud.
As I grew older, I started to question something: why did I care about what others thought about what I love? If One Direction’s music made me happy, why would I want to hide that? Slowly but surely, I became unashamedly vocal about what I loved, letting everyone know that yes, I do love that new Top 40 song. Once this realization occurred, everything started to feel so much more enjoyable.
If I could give one bit of advice to my younger self it would be that you shouldn’t be ashamed of
what you love. Whether it’s a band marketed toward preteens, a movie series everyone stopped being obsessed with in middle school, or eccentric fashion, you should embrace it.
Being passionate about something shouldn’t be embarrassing. Passion is awesome! It’s important to be true to the real you. If the real you loves pop music, make sure you spend time each day dancing around your room to it. If the real you loves the Kardashians, keep live-tweeting the new episodes. Whatever the real you loves, embrace it and cultivate joy from it. Not only will this positively impact your mood, but so many other positives can come from it. You’ll find new friends who love the same things you do. So do more of what makes you happy, even if others may judge you for it. You’ll realize soon enough that their opinions are arbitrary. Don’t be ashamed of what you love.