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Cal Poly Students Reveal Their Most Outrageous Drunchies

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal Poly chapter.


n. /drŭn:ch’eez /

1. An insatiable and overpowering sense of hunger one gets after a few hours of drinking.

2. Something that Cal Poly students are good at satisfying.

If you’ve ever been on campus after 11 pm on Thursday, Friday or Saturday nights, you’re likely to have seen clusters of intoxicated kids stumbling around and yelling about how hungry they are. Some recommend VG’s, most do Taco Bell and some don’t even eat (don’t do that). And then you have the homeward bound—the kids who stumble home and eat whatever speaks to them. Regardless of where they go, drunchies can hit Cal Poly students hard, so hard, in fact, that it can make for a worthwhile story to share with the school.

These are their stories:

“One time I came home and made oatmeal with hot chai tea instead of hot water and it was amazing. Another time I made cup of noodles with coffee and that was not so good. This is what happens when you have access to a Keurig.”

-Lexi De La Fuente, 2nd year English major


“I once ate a jar of Trader Joe’s Cookie Butter as dip for my cheese Cheetos. I think it was good because of the sweet and salty.”

– 3rd year Agricultural Communications major

“Over winter break I was hanging out with a friend of mine and we were having a few drinks. He opened the freezer to see what food I had and I heard an astonished exclamation of “what the f*ck is this?” I’m not sure if you know what bully sticks are but they’re these hard jerky-like dog treats that are basically chew toys. They are somewhat expensive, so I decided to try to make some at home. They are rather simple to make; the caveat is that they are made of dried bull penis. My friend told me if I fried it up and ate six inches of the bull penis he’d cover my bar tab for a year. I did the consequential analysis and determined that six inches of fried bull penis for likely more than $300 (in drinks over a year) was a pretty nice deal, especially accounting for inflation. I did it and, to be honest, it was not the most unpleasant gastronomic experience I’ve had. I would gladly do it again for the same price.”

-Tristan Noack, 3rd year Philosophy major

“One time I came home absolutely smashed and ate an entire pack of frozen waffles while they were still frozen.”

–Reilly Blickenstaff, 2nd year History major

 “I’ve eaten some pretty crazy things without drinking.”

– Loren Kline, 5th year Electrical Engineering major


“Best drunchie ever has to be the Sexy Mindy, named by one of my friend’s old roommates. It’s peanut butter, fried egg and Sriracha on toast. Sounds strange but delicious and actually good for helping calm an impending hangover! “

(Fun fact: Lauren’s friend Mike from @whalebirdkombucha made this for her the night she met her boyfriend! Sexy Mindy is apparently an aphrodisiac, too).

-Lauren MacLeod, 3rd year Nutrition major

“Chilly Peppers is dank AF.”

 – Jesse Gibson, 4th year Environmental Management and Protection major

My roommates and I pooled all our veggies and potatoes to make “group soup”.

 – Hannah, 3rd year Journalism major

If you’re hungry for more drunchie inspiration, follow  @humansoflatenightvgs on Instagram. Eat responsibly, Mustangs.

Anuja Argade is a fourth year Event Planning student studying at Cal Poly, San Luis Obispo. Her guilty pleasures include late night cereal, good olive oil and spiritual TED Talks (preferably in that order). At dinner parties you will find Anuja admiring the wall instead of socializing like a decent human being. When she's not at dinner parties, Anuja loves crafting things with her hands and hopes to one day build a barn for her potential pet goat. For business or pleasure, contact Anuja at anuja.argade@aol.com.  
Gina was formerly the Beauty & Culture Editor at Her Campus, where she oversaw content and strategy for the site's key verticals. She was also the person behind @HerCampusBeauty, and all those other glowy selfies you faved. She got her start in digital media as a Campus Correspondent at HC Cal Poly San Luis Obispo, where she graduated in 2017 with degrees in English and Theater. Now, Gina is an LA-based writer and editor, and you can regularly find her wearing a face mask in bed and scrolling through TikTok.