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The Reality of Having Friends in Graduate School

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal Lutheran chapter.

It is common in college to have friends in an earlier and/or later graduating class than you. It honestly doesn’t make a big difference within college until your friends start to graduate and move into their career or onto graduate school. The problem is that after they graduate, while you are still in college you will feel weird not having them with you every night because they were your roommates, or every day because they were in 2 of your classes.

Two of my best friends and roommates throughout college graduated in the class of 2019 while I will be in class of 2020 this May. One went into Law School in Los Angeles and the other went into a Teaching Credential Program in Santa Barbara. Unfortunately, that means they are at least 2 hours away from me at any given time. Although that may not sound bad, the thought that I saw them nearly everyday for the past several years has been hard, and I know I am not alone in this.

The best way to handle this is by making plans in advance, that way you can ensure you will all be free. If you all can’t commit to spending time together every so often, then it will be that much more difficult to keep in touch. For example, the 3 of us decided that we will see each other at least once a year, every single year. It may not seem like a lot, but all of us are at drastically different points in our lives that we really don’t know where we will all end up in the next few years.

Having either a snapchat group or a group text is the best way to stay in touch. We ask each other questions in there, keep the others informed on what is going on in our lives, and just send gifs back and forth. This is what really allows us to feel that we are all still connected as much as we once were.                                

Although this should go without saying, Grad School is meant to be difficult and time consuming. If you have friends that are going this extra step for their career, understand that nearly all of their time is being taken up by classes, studying, and preparing. It is not comparable to undergrad because there is much more they will need to do to graduate on time and have good grades. This isn’t forever, but it is important to respect that. If they are able to make time for you, don’t take advantage of it, because it likely meant they sacrificed their extra studying time for it. 

College is already difficult, but maintaining the relationships you make during that time are important too. Take care of yourself but also those that you care about. Long distance friendships are difficult, but they can completely work if you want them to. As long as you truly care about each other and your friendship, everything else will fall into place.

Shout out to Kira and Kyla for excelling in your Graduate Programs. You are both going to be so successful in your near future!

All Photos Courtesy of the Author

Francheska Cal

Cal Lutheran '20

Francheska is a Senior at California Lutheran University and is President of Her Campus at Cal Lutheran. She is majoring in Interdisciplinary Educational Studies with a minor in Psychology. Francheska imagines herself as a second grade teacher in an elementary school within the next 5 years in the Los Angeles area.
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