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Sex + Relationships

A Shy Girl’s Guide to Shooting Her Shot

It’s kinda funny that I’m writing an article about shooting your shot when I’m the last person that would.

Maybe I’m writing this for other women who are just as scared as I am, or maybe it’s really meant for me. Making the first move is definitely easier said than done: “Go talk to them”, “Just smile”, “What’s the worst they can say?” That’s just the problem– there is a lot that could go wrong, at least in my head. Having the confidence to approach a guy is hard for me, but it’s something I’m working to overcome. 

I have a hard time accepting myself as good enough, which I think a lot of girls struggle with. Constantly comparing myself to everyone else holds me back a lot and keeps me in my shell. But I’ve definitely missed out on a lot of potential conversations cause I was the shy girl in the corner. Staying in the back is never going to help you build up confidence. 

Who isn’t afraid of rejection? I know I’m big-time afraid of it. I think that’s the main reason I won’t do anything when I have a crush. How can I go for that one person and then have to see them around campus– how awkward would that be? For me, it seems much easier to hide and crush from afar than to actually put myself out there. But I’ve found that I’m more disappointed in myself when I do nothing than when I get rejected. 

I also hold myself back because I’ve always thought of myself as extremely shy, but honestly, I’m starting to realize shyness is all in your head. You just have to be yourself– if you’re not being yourself in front of a guy, what’s the point? Break out of your comfort zone for two seconds. The introduction is always the scariest part, but once you get past that, it’ll all be okay.

I’m definitely not an expert in the subject of guys or flirting or “shooting your shot”; I’d like to be, but I’m far from it. I, too, struggle with being confident in front of boys, but a lot of it is an internal struggle. I wish I was able to offer more advice about it. But I take comfort in the fact that we all have our struggle with dating. You never know what could happen, and there’s always room to grow. So who knows, maybe next time I’ll just go for it!

Hey guys! I'm a freshman here at the College of Charleston and I'm from a small town called Indian land Sc. I grew up in Charlotte. I absolutely love everything about Charleston and I'm so excited to be able to call it home. When I'm not busy with work and school I love reading, listening to music and of course the occasional Netflix marathon.
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