I love all the classic Christmas movies like Home Alone, Elf, and It’s a Wonderful Life, but they’re not my favorites. I feel a true sense of holiday magic when I am watching a cringey romance unfold in fake snow. I started this article last year, but have since seen way more Christmas movies set in made-up countries, so I felt it was time to expand the list.
1. A Christmas Prince
A writer named Amber is sent to the made-up country of “Aldovia” to write a piece on the scandalous life of king-to-be, Richard (a character whose name clearly bursts with traditional Aldovian culture). He has a British accent for some reason and yes, you guessed it, they fall in love. But only after they literally fall down together…like on the ground…….get it? Oh, but it’s in the snow so it’s Christmas. Everyone dresses and looks like a catalog model for The Gap. In addition, there are many scenes that take place in the middle of snow-covered mountains, but everyone is in a light sweater. Frost bite doesn’t exist and neither does this country but somehow love prevails.
2. Christmas Cupid
This movie stars Christina Milian and Chad Michael Murray. Yes, you read that correctly. Two of the most iconic actors in Hollywood starring in the same movie. I almost fell over when I found out this existed.
Okay I’m sorry, I’m about to completely derail this article, but did anyone watch that Riverdale episode where our good friend Chad tries to escape on a rocket? Like yo, Riverdale writers, I think you have taken it a bit too far.
ANYWAY, Christina’s character Sloane is a big time Hollywood agent who is a huge social climber. She gets knocked down a peg or two by the ghost played by Ashely Benson and the whole thing ends in a holiday engagement. Also, Ashely Benson’s sass levels are off the chart in this film which should put it straight to the top of your holiday watch list.
3. Let it Snow
I have to admit I enjoyed this movie a lot more than I thought I was going to. Based off the novel written by John Green (our favorite cheesy YA fiction novelest) Lauren Myracle, and Maureen Johnson, it has all the elements for disaster: teen angst, multiple stories coming together to form one big story, and the guy from Disney’s Descendants. In the end, it was kind of cute but still cringey as heck. There is a scene where they sing around an organ in a church and Joan Cusack wears a tin foil suit the whole time with no explanation. Seriously, they don’t explain it at all and it’s still bothering me. Its been four days and it’s keeping me up at night. It’s not just the hat it’s a whole tinfoil outfit! Why Joan Cusack, why?
4. The Princess Switch
In this holiday feature, Vanessa Hudgens stars as Stacy who goes to a made-up country for a baking competition and finds her royal doppelganger, Lady Margaret who is also played by Vanessa Hudgens. Chaos ensues when they switch places because get this, one has an English accent and the other doesn’t, oh and one can bake AND one can’t! If you don’t have time to watch this movie, please just skip to min 1:42 of the trailer. At this time stamp, “Stacy” is literally so bad at being a fake princess she summersaults over a horse.
Besides this plot, I feel it is my duty to tell my avid readers that I’m lowkey best friends with ole Vanessa. She said a very brief hello to my entire student group when I was fifteen, so I guess you could say I have friends in high places.
I hope you enjoyed this list of terrible Christmas movies and it inspires you to search the depths of Netflix for entertainment. Also, if you ever want to be a princess, just remember not to summersault over a horse!