10 Thoughts on Becoming a Sorority Alumnae

I honestly never thought the day would come when I was going to have to say “goodbye” to my sorority sisters and my beloved sorority.  Sure, there were days when I couldn’t wait to go alum or to finally be done with getting points or keeping up my grades or even having to attend workshops (yes, you know the ones that go all day long).  But honestly, I wouldn’t trade any of these moments (good and bad) for the world.  That’s why as I get closer and closer to being an alumna for my sorority it’s becoming very bittersweet, and here is what’s going through my head.  

Cheers for no more workshop weekends (kinda).

No more not going out or not being able to leave campus for a whole weekend because you have a risk management workshop or recruitment workshop or whatever other thing your sorority can possibly workshop.  No more threats of fines for not being able to attend events.  No more of the stuff you “hated.”  But as tedious or unnecessary as all of that seemed, it wasn’t that bad.  Sure you couldn’t leave a room for four hours at a time but usually there was food and usually what you were talking about wasn’t that bad.  And, it was time with your sisters that you might not have gotten otherwise.  You bonded because you didn’t want to be there and in the end came out stronger than you thought you could be.  It’s funny how those things work out.  

No more going out during the week?

Mixers, date parties, sisterhood events (both official and unofficial)–graduating means leaving all of that behind.  Now you can’t make excuses for showing up with sunglasses to work or looking a little rough the next morning.  You actually have to be an adult, a full on functioning adult.  And you’ll miss it.  You’ll miss the stories after the mixers and date parties.  Who stole someone else’s date? Who just came for the pizza (**hint, it was probably us**)?  Or, who was kicked out before the party got poppin’? You won’t have those moments anymore.  And that’s sad.  Now we’ll have to live vicariously through our littles and grand-littles who are still getting to experience it all.  (We expect lots of video evidence.)

No, I don’t want to say goodbye to my little **cue crying**

I can’t even say it because I don’t want to face it myself.  Be good little ones, make us proud.  You’ll miss late nights with them that probably included pizza and grape juice that really wasn’t grape juice, spa nights, formals and sisterhood retreats where you were able to take adorable pictures for Instagram.  You’ll miss spoiling them silly because you could and making sure they were okay whenever things went awry.  You’ll miss being there because they were like the child you didn’t actually have to give birth to or raise.  But the good news is that becoming an alumna doesn’t mean saying goodbye forever.  There’s still Facebook, texting, Snapchat and a million other ways to contact them.  So don’t lose touch.  They’re in your life for a reason.  

So, now I don’t get praised for every accomplishment?

You know you’ll miss being surrounded by women who were constantly accomplishing things–whether that be getting a scholarship, acing papers or getting awesome internships.  And you’ll miss that when they did or if you did something great, everyone knew about it.  You got praised at chapter or by your sisters for doing things and making your beloved sorority proud.  After graduation, that won’t necessarily happen.  Sure, you can let people know about your accomplishments via Facebook but that’s not as fun as being called out in chapter or at an event for achieving big or accomplishing your goal.  

Well, there goes my motivation.

Speaking of accomplishments, who pushed you to do what you wanted to do?  Who pushed you to try harder?  Yeah, it was probably your sisters.  They inspired you to do big things and settle for nothing but the best.  They pushed you to do things that made others proud to be a part of your sorority.  And above all they kept you motivated even when you didn’t want to do more than the bare minimum.  Now, who’s going to do that for you?  It’ll probably be you.  You’ll still have your friends and some of your sisters in your life via social media or an alumnae chapter, but it’s not the same.

What is an alumnae chapter?

Honestly I still don’t know the full answer to this question, but if you don’t want to be done with your sorority this is an opportunity for you to keep going.  You can grow even more through service opportunities or helping younger sisters grow during their sorority experience.  Whatever you do with it, know that it’s an opportunity for you to continue.  

Don’t cry, don’t cry!

Yeah it’ll probably happen.  All at once it’ll hit you that this is not your life anymore and you don’t have your sorority events to fall back on or use as destressors.  You’ll have to come to terms with the fact that you have to leave your sisters behind and be an adult.  You have to leave your little behind and let them be their own person for a little bit.  It’s bittersweet because you might be ready to go but it’s hard to let go of something you’ve put years into.  

No. More. Dues.

Okay, this might just be me being snarky but get ready to (hopefully) not be a broke a** b**ch anymore.  Holla! (And then you remember that alumnae dues and actual bills exist.)

Okay, I’m crying…

It happened.  Just let the waterworks flow.

Goodbye, sorority, I’ll miss you!

Finally, you’ll come to terms with the fact that you’re leaving.  You’re graduating college and moving onto bigger and better things.  You’re becoming an adult and that in and of itself is huge.  Sorority life might have been a big part of your life for a few years but now it’s something you can look back on as a beloved memory.  You can remember recruitment and bid day, meeting your little for the first time, going to formals, getting to know your sisters and sitting through risk management workshops that could have probably been emails.  You’ll miss them.  And, eventually, you’ll get to share those memories with someone you love.  Someone who may be a legacy.  And that will be something you can look forward to for years to come.

So, thank you sorority and Greek life for everything you have done for us.  We’ll remember the good times and the bad, the nights we should remember but don’t, the tears we shed with our sisters and the fact that at one point we had 100 other closets we could pick from.  We’ll miss all of it.  But for now we have to realize we’re graduating, and what’s to come is even better.  

All photos courtesy of Marissa Myhill.