We all have those mistakes we would take back in a second. That one we absolutely hate ourselves for. The one thing we cringe and whine about when our mind lets us think back to it. We might even be embarrassed thinking to ourselves for that single second we wander back to the memory. But do those pave the road to where we are now? Or have those stones been set since, well forever?
I pondered this thought for a few days after hearing the quote on a Sex and the City late night rerun. It was one of those studying alone and have the TV on for some kind of company or white noise nights. It caught my attention as fast as your heart beats when you run into an ex-boyfriend and duck because you know you look like a mess. I couldn’t help but jot it down in my planner so I wouldn’t forget it and allow my eyes to roll over it the next couple days.
I came to a conclusion a few days later that maybe we, as humans, think we set our entire future, or fate. Maybe that’s the reason we kick ourselves when we do something dumb, like thinking back to that person we know is no good for us. Maybe it’s the reason we applaud ourselves when we know we’ve done something excellent to add to our future career path. Do we consider these things to be our “fate” that we ourselves created? If we do, then surely our mistakes play a major role in this, but not all of it.
You know how you roll your eyes when you hear people say, “Oh it was fate!” or, “what’s meant to be will be”? Maybe all those things refer back to what is inevitable for our future fate, good or bad. Do we make mistakes subconsciously knowing they will catch up with us later? White lie style? Or do we simply think they have no effect on our fate itself? Maybe some people think it’s their own sort of “karma”, if you will. Maybe you think when you make that mistake it will catch up later. So is that part of fate? Or, maybe you think that part is contributing to what’s already set out for you fate-wise.
There’s no way someone can look at you and classify what counts as your mistake or not. Everyone has their own interpretations of them, or at least what they consider to be a mistake for themselves. Therefore, everyone must have their own interpretation of fate and what they contribute personally to it.
As far as I’m concerned, the mistakes I cringe about, may have in fact lead me to right where I am now in my life. Maybe those mistakes were what shaped my learning or lessons in life. I wouldn’t have made the good decisions without basing some off experience, right? So I guess I’m proclaiming my fate to be made up of a handful of things, mistakes included.