At this point, we all know the feeling of indecisiveness every Thursday when we ask ourselves the internal question: to go to Happy Hour or not? This is how most Central bar nights happen.
6:00 pm – THE DECISION. To go or not to go? That is the question. Downtown to the bars or down the hall to your bed and Netflix? As tough as this is — remind yourself that you are young and you have your entire life to lie around and do nothing. So, to the bar it is!
6:05 pm – THE STRUGGLE. Now it’s time to get ready and this is the biggest struggle of the night. So you turn up the music and destroy your closet finding something to wear. Per usual, you throw on a similar concoction of an outfit you’ve worn one too many times.
7:00 pm – LET’S GO. Whether you are ready or not, someone in your house is. You’d better kick it into 3rd gear and get ready to head out the door.
7:30 pm – THE BEGINNING. Depending on the amount in your bank account, you may or may not make a pit stop at your friend’s house that lives closer to the bar. This way you can have a drink or two at their house before you start a tab at The Bird, Gator, AND The Blackstone.
If you happen to have the funds for drinks at the bar — this is the time to head straight there to catch the specials.
8ish pm – ARRIVAL. The Bird is always the word and always the first stop of the evening. Squeeze your way through the entry and spot your friends at the bar or at the big round picnic table next to the window. As you walk in, you see a good friend and say, “AHHH HIII,” as if you haven’t seen them in forever. Happy hour has not ended yet and you can get a two-dollar double and maybe a dollar hot dog. I mean — why not, right?
9:00 – 9:30pm – ROUND ‘EM UP. Now that you have had your fair share of drinks, hot dogs, maybe a round of pool, and 14 trips to the bathroom, it’s time to round up your friends (the ones who haven’t already trailed off). Next stop: The Blue Gator. Why do we endure the cold and a three-block walk to go see all the same friends we already saw? Well, to see the friends who never make it to The Bird, a change of scenery, and obviously the SHABOOM room. (Shout out to the Gator for giving us a new exciting reason to go downtown on Thursday nights.)
9:30 – 10pm – THE WAIT. This is a hit or miss. Props if you got to The Gator before the line and cover charge. If not… well, hopefully you wore a coat.
10:00 – 11ish pm – HELLO GATOR. Ah, you have survived the line and scrounged up the three dollars for the cover. Before you can find a booth or spot on the dance floor, obviously it’s straight to the bathroom. ANOTHER LINE. It’s okay, because usually at this point you love everyone and make ten new girlfriends while cramming into the tiny hallway by the bathrooms. Clearly, this is also the perfect time to SnapChat selfies to the sorry friends who chose Netflix.
11:00 pm – LET THE FUN BEGIN. Bathroom. Check. Pictures. Check. Friends. Wait, where the hell did they go? Make your rounds through the bar and the Shaboom room. Say hi to the girl you had in your 8 am this morning, hug the people you haven’t seen in “forever,” and by the grace of God, find your friends in the first booth and say, “OMG I thought you left me.” You are just too excited to be reunited.
11:05 – 12:00 am – PARTY. Dance. To the bar. Dance. WATER. Pictures. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Slowly… Actually, rather quickly since The Gator is packed and everyone including the kid who lived down the hall from you freshman year is there.
12:00 am – SING ALONG. It’s about that time the DJ plays a song for us all to sing-along to like a giant CMU Musical. Can someone finish this line? “SWEET CAROLINE…”
12:30 am – OUCH. If you are the sorry sap who wore heels, you are “literally dying” at this point. If you are the smart one who wore flats or boots, you are talking your girlfriend out of taking her shoes off because that is just nasty.
1:00 – 2:00 am – THE END. The night is coming to an end and the bar is emptying out and you have two options.
Option A: Go outside and snag the first cab OR hop in the car of your greatest friend ever who didn’t go out and probably hates you on so many levels right now.
Option B: Tread the walk home and stop on the way for walking tacos on the corner or attempt to get Dog Central if you are willing to wait (that Mac Dog is usually worth the wait).
2:00 am – GOODNIGHT, Mount Pleasant. Crawl into your bed full on drinks, food, and friends.
Sometime the next day- OH NO. Watch your 120-second SnapChat story and re-live all of the night’s greatest moments in the comfort of your apartment, where you do not have to show your face again… until Monday morning.