We all know the New Girl story of Nick and Jess (if you don’t that is a crime and you must spend your Christmas vacation catching up on the show), best friends that live together, and realize that they have been in love with each other for years. So, to the dismay of their other roommates, they start dating. Most people are skeptical that this relationship will actually work long-term, but there are some of us that disagree. Call us hopeless romantics, but we believe that there is something unexpectedly wonderful about dating the boy next door.
He’s seen you at your worst
Let’s face it, unless you are Heidi Klum, who is so flawless it’s unfair, you are not always going to look good. During the first few months of dating someone new, it’s a hassle to hold yourself together all the time. No one should feel the need to pull an Annie-from-Bridesmaids, and wake up early to put some makeup on. Some mornings you are going to wake up with snot hanging out of your nose, and hair that looks like you have been electrocuted in your sleep – it’s not going to be pretty. Even though you really want to impress the person you like, and pretend that you are a Victoria’s Secret supermodel, you want someone who makes you feel loved and welcome when you are at your absolute worst: someone who can make you laugh through your sinus infection, someone who doesn’t care that you ate the whole container of Ben and Jerry’s, or that you still dress up as Hermoine every time you watch the Harry Potter movies. You want someone who makes you feel 100% comfortable. You want your best friend. On a more serious note, as a friend, he will not only be aware of your personal weaknesses, but he will know how to respond to them in a way that is constructive to the relationship and to your desire to improve yourself.
Remember that you will also have seen him at his worst. You’ll be fully aware of his bad fashion sense, his corny jokes, and disgusting eating habits. You might even love him all the more for those quirks that you would find annoying in anybody else.
It’s still exciting
Dating a friend might seem less glamorous than falling in love at first sight, but what’s more suspenseful than decoding a friend’s flirty mixed signals for signs of romantic intentions? A best friend’s touch is one that you are not used to seeing as sexy, so exploring a new kind of intimacy with him is both unexpected and steamy. Plus, he knows you so well that he probably already knows what you like ;). Just imagine the energy that you and a friend-turned-boyfriend will share after months, maybe even years, of pent-up romantic tension.
It’s easy to take your best friend for granted — they will always be there simply because they always have been. Their love is unconditional, and that’s a kind of compassion we’re not used to receiving. So it is new and amazing when someone offers their entire heart to us on a daily basis with no expectation of compensation, and at the end of the day, we all know that kind of love is what we really need.
He will be there for you
Although passion is important in a relationship, you want someone who still makes for good company even after the passion starts to plateau. Your best friend is there when it is least convenient for him. This type of dedication is rare. He’ll be there to pick you up on the night when nothing has gone right and you’re left shivering in the rain. He already knows about the boys who have broken your heart, and he will make it his mission not to be one of them. Reversely, you know about the girls who have broken his heart, so both of you will have a sense of each other’s relationships issues, and will be better prepared to deal with potential conflicts together. It sometimes takes these moments to realize how lucky you are to have a friend like this. These are the moments that lasting relationships are based off of.
Sometimes we are blind of the simple happiness that we share with a best friend. We live in a culture where it is easier to trade the flame of infatuation for the comfort of a real space in someone’s heart — something that we construct on an unglamorous, daily basis with a friend. When you are with someone who likes you entirely for who you are — and not how new or different or sexy you might be on any given day — you realize that relationships are all about the supposedly boring things that happen between the big moments. They are about feeling your best when you’re in the company of someone who cares for you.
So if you are unsure about what to do, you should take a chance and date your best friend because sometimes the best relationships come from friendship.
Sources:
http://thoughtcatalog.com/bayli-shelton/2013/11/you-really-shouldnt-kiss-any-of-your-friends/