As women, we can either spend our entire lives in small groups pouring over tweets and texts, trying to understand what goes in the head of a guy… or we could just ask one. I can’t tell you how much my life improved the day I realized that my guy friends could actually be put to good use. Sometimes you just need a guy to explain to you in no uncertain terms what’s going through another guy’s head because often it is something that would never occur to us. One thing I’ve realized is that men are rarely as complicated as we think. Problems start to arise when we try to overanalyze their each and every move when really, their actions show you exactly what you need to know.
In light of this, I asked a couple of my guy friends why they were unfaithful in their relationships and got some really interesting replies. Read on to gain a teensy bit more insight into the psyche of the twenty-something college male.
Guy A: I cheated because at the end of the day my girlfriend isn’t my wife. The level of commitment just isn’t the same and at this age I don’t see the need to act like every single relationship I’m in is for life. I have a very clear idea about what kind of girl is going to be a temporary feature in my life and what kind of girl I’m going to marry, so to me cheating on someone who isn’t going to be in my life permanently isn’t a big deal.
Guy B: Honestly, our relationship wasn’t strong enough to begin with. I liked her a lot, I enjoyed her company and she was very attractive, but the emotional connection just wasn’t there. There was no connection beyond surface level so it felt like we were just going through the motions. So when other girls approached me it was a no-brainer. Eventually the relationship just kind of fizzled out; neither of us really tried to fight for it and honestly I think she was cheating too.
Guy C: I think I just wasn’t ready for a serious relationship. It was kind of a situation where something I always intended to be just a casual hookup became more serious than I anticipated. I kept saying I didn’t want anything serious but it was like she wasn’t hearing me so eventually I just went with the flow, but in my mind, it was still just a hookup. And it was fine while it lasted, but eventually I got tired of being wifed up with a girl I really didn’t want to be with. But how could I break up with someone who in my mind I wasn’t really with? So I was just doing me. She didn’t see it like that, unfortunately, so she was really upset, but I said from the get go I wasn’t looking for a girlfriend.
Guy D: The distance was just too much, and I know that sounds like a cop-out, but it honestly just became a burden. I really wanted to be with her, but I think I just wasn’t mature enough to handle the distance, and it became more trouble than it was worth. For a while I thought I was onto something perfect; I could have my girl as well as enjoy myself in college and no one would know, but eventually sh*t caught up with me and things went downhill real fast. It is definitely something I regret but you live and you learn.
Guy E: I got drunk one night and had sex with another girl. I never told my girlfriend and she never found out and I don’t see myself doing it again. I do feel guilty about it, but I love my girlfriend and I don’t think that one night is enough to mess up what is otherwise a solid relationship. You know? I’d rather deal with the guilt than hurt her and destroy our relationship for nothing.
Guy F: My situation is just really complicated to be honest. I’ve been with my girl for a while and it’s been pretty good, but it’s reached kind of a slow patch where we’ve been arguing a lot and things just aren’t as fun anymore. A couple weeks ago I met another girl and things are just so much simpler with her; no drama, no stress and the sex is really good too. I’m just not sure what to do at this point ’cause I really like this girl, but I don’t know if I want to throw away my relationship over something that might just be a passing thing in my life.
So there you have it collegiettes! Straight from the horse’s mouth. Whether men are remorseful or not, take note if you don’t want to end up with a cheating boyfriend. Better yet, keep your eyes open for the signs of a cheater!