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Why Hipster-Haters Are Worse Than Actual Hipsters

 

**Please note that these descriptions are based off of extreme stereotypes of “hipsters” and no actual BU students or other Boston-area students. This article is satrical.**

We all know the hipster stereotype, especially living in Boston: giant glasses, some thrift-shop flannel, Polaroid camera in hand and music by artists no one even knew existed blasting through the giant headphones they have plugged into one of their 10 different Apple products. Almost everyone has a little hipster quality – maybe you’re into photography or can rock the glasses without looking like a dork (in which case: kudos to you, my friend) – but there is little more annoying than the all-out, classic, stereotyped hipster.

Unless, of course, you consider the people who go out of their way to point out just how annoying said hipsters are. These are our top three reasons why people who complain about hipsters are even more annoying than the hipsters themselves.

They’re Unavoidable

Sure, hipsters are pretty annoying. Be sure not to let them see that your sweater is name-brand or know that you like “mainstream” bands like Passion Pit – you’ll never hear the end of it. But here’s the thing: hipsters that are willing to berate you for your music preferences are usually pretty easy to spot. And you know what that means? They’re easy to avoid. Maybe you won’t discuss where you like to shop with the guy typing furiously on his laptop in the corner of Starbucks, sipping his Venti Green Chai Latte, because you know only trouble can come from it.

But unavoidable is the loud, annoying and obnoxious patron behind you in line who just can’t stand all the hipsters in the place and will dramatically roll his eyes every time someone orders a semi-complicated beverage. They’re everywhere, loud and self-righteous with their opinions, and frankly, pretty irritating. Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but no one is entitled to forcing it onto others. It’s times like these when I think, “If you can’t stand the hipster presence in Starbucks, why didn’t you go to Dunkin instead?”

They’re Guilty of All the Same Tendencies

What makes hipsters most annoying? Their infatuation with not being “mainstream”? Their preference for clothing that was popular 40 years ago? Or their tendency to criticize tastes that don’t match their own? Personally, I’d venture to say it’s option number three: the stereotypical hipster tends to act a bit superior just because their tastes in music and fashion are a bit different than the rest.

Here’s where the hipsters’ favorite literary term comes into play: don’t you think it’s a bit ironic that these people who hate the hipsters for their critical, superior attitudes are being so critical and superior themselves?

Now, don’t get me wrong: everyone dislikes a hipster. Even hipsters don’t like hipsters. But the people I’m referring to here take it to new levels. By being critical of the opinions of the hipsters and feeling like their “popular” and widely-shared tastes are better than the “underground” preferences of the hipsters, hipster-haters are literally being the Ultimate Hipster. Think about it: you can’t get much less mainstream than opposing the people who oppose pop culture.

We’re All Almost Offended

So here’s the cold, hard truth: no one likes hipsters, and yet we’re all a little bit hipster.

There, I said it. Face the facts – we live in Boston, and we’ve all got a hipster tendency or two. For me personally, I really like photography (I’m a photojournalism major after all), and I can occasionally be found outside with my Diana F+ taking pictures on 120 mm film. I also really like thrift stores (though that’s slowly becoming more and more popular) and my own mother recently described my style as, and I quote, “you’ve got that whole hipster-thing going on.”

Everyone says they hate hipsters, but everyone also has that one thing in common with them, even if it’s as simple as also owning a Mac. So when that guy or girl behind you in line at Starbucks starts harping on the hipster’s fashion choices, I occasionally can’t help but feel offended as well as annoyed, and I’m sure I’m not alone on this one.

In Conclusion…

It’s true, no one likes a hardcore hipster. But it’s also true that no one likes a complainer, either, and Hipster-Haters are slowly evolving into the Ultimate Hipsters. So the next time you’re about two seconds from storming angrily away from an irritating complainer, just remember: you’re not alone. We’re all annoyed by the Ultimate Hipsters, too.

 

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