It’s that time of year again. The chill sets in, the leaves change color, and we whip out our slightly vintage DVD copies of Twilight to set the tone. The age-old question emerges once again: would you rather be a sparkly-skinned, red-eyed vampire or a furry, shapeshifting werewolf? Now, to make that choice more universal, let’s step away from the world of Stephenie Meyer and do a dive into the pros and cons of each, brought to us by popular notions and folktales surrounding the mythic legends
Vampires: bloodthirsty, pale, humanoid creatures that often resemble beautiful humans or, in the case of Nosferatu, old, decrepit men. The consensus around vampires is that:
- They can hypnotize and control others
- Some adaptations have them take the form of bats, mist, or other horrors of the night
- They heal quickly from injuries
- They are immortal with an extremely long lifespan
- They have superhuman speed, reflexes, and senses
With these killer pros, you would be surprised that anyone is Team Jacob in Twlight. However, it would be my mistake not to mention some of the grave cons a vampire possesses:
- They must be invited inside
- A vampire needs blood to survive
- In some adaptations, once the original vampire is killed, all the turned ones die as well
- They may burn in the sun
- Vampires are susceptible to garlic, decapitation, or wooden stakes
With great power comes great consequence. The question then arises: is the promise of superhuman speed and eternity worth the chance of dying from just a little garlic bread at grandma’s house? I personally would be second-guessing.
Now to discuss a slightly horrific version of man’s best friend! Werewolves have been in legends just as long as vampires and have long been the other half. Werewolves are known to have:
- Incredible physical strength
- High agility and speed
- A strong sense of smell and hearing
- Accelerated healing
- Transformation into a wolf-like creature
- Powerful insticts
For animal lovers, a werewolves furry nature may also be a selling point compared to vampires. However, werewolves often experience things that stray them further from humanity:
- Losing control during full moons
- Painful shifting and emotional transformations — in some legends, this is involuntary
- Susceptible to silver
- Hard to hide identity
- Mortal
Imagine having the full moon interrupt you from going to the Olivia Rodrigo concert! Maybe being a vampire isn’t so bad after all… That being said, the cons of werewolves stem from an animalistic war between human and wolf — something to be considered is all.
With all this in mind, it’s truly a subjective choice on which monster people prefer. The pros and cons of each carry weight and are a testament to how and why this pairing is enticing in movies, legends, and stories. Many of the pros for each rely on monstrous techniques and unique abilities, while their cons share the common sentiment: lack of agency and control.
I have my pick of monster for sure, and it has nothing to do with the #TeamEdward shirt in my closet…
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