My Dad Critiques Paris Fashion Week SS17

We’ve all looked at runway shows and wondered what the designer was thinking. Even as someone interested in fashion, I’ve sometimes been stumped. So why not ask my dad his opinion? He actually dresses pretty well; he isn’t plagued by the stereotypical “dad fashion.” (However, he did, upon seeing me in a crop top, ask where the other half of my shirt went.)  I was pleasantly surprised by some insightful answers, but there is plenty of comedy gold to follow as well. So without further ado, my dad’s comments on Paris Fashion Week.

 

A.P.C.

“Men’s ‘tighty whiteys?’ Umm…how about no.  Pretty easy target for ‘wedgies’ or ‘pantsing,’ too.”

 

 

Balmain

“Has anybody seen me ‘Lucky Charms?’”

 

 

Celine

“The top and the jacket are stylish, but it looks like she is wearing some guy’s pants that are too big—look at the way the waist bulges under the jacket.  Why would someone want to wear something so unflattering?”

 

 

Celine

“Is this an ink blot test?  Or did she face plant on a Smurf?”

 

 

Comme des Garҫon

“Chim Chiminey, Chim Chiminey, Chim Chim Cher-ee, a Sweep is as lucky as lucky can be.” [song from Mary Poppins]

 

 

Comme des Garҫon

“Is this King Kong’s thumb?”

 

Dior

“Actually like this jacket and skirt—could see [my sister] wearing this. Although all the red sort of screams Deadpool.

 

 

Elie Saab

“This is really cute and fun!  Bright, colorful, and very flattering.  A little bit of Magical Mystery Tour and some Power Puff Girls.  The shaded glasses add to the look.”

 

 

Elie Saab

“I like this too.  Whimsical and fun.  Could see this at a club or on the red carpet.”

 

 

Giambattista Valli

“Is this the black version of Seinfeld’s puffy shirt?  It’s got to go!  Replace it with a fitted white tee and call it good.”

 

 

Givenchy

“Like the dress—colorful and striking.  Don’t understand the slip hanging below the dress.  But Xena the Warrior Princess will be happy to hear that someone has located her missing shield.”

 

 

Hermès

“’Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree…’ Maybe I could take this as a skirt with a different top.”

 

 

Isabel Marant

“Love the boots.  I think this would be great as a sleeveless dress, but the style looks like something a 5-year-old girl would wear.”

 

 

Isabel Marant

“The pants are ok, but the shirt looks like something high school and college wrestlers wear to sweat off water to make their weight class.”

 

 

Sacai

“What could I even say about this?  Maybe you could drag it out on Thanksgiving.  Or maybe for the Mummer’s Parade.”

 

***All photos from Vogue.com***