When I decided where to go to college, it wasn’t just about me. I also had to consider my friends, my family, and my boyfriend. However, I knew that I had to follow my own path and ambitious aspirations when deciding where to get my education, so I excitedly decided on Boston University. Unfortunately, moving to Boston brought me 700 miles away from the people I loved most in the world.
Not unlike many other college women across the country, I am managing a long-distance relationship. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost two years, and I knew that no matter where I went to school, we wanted to stay together. Though the past few months have been difficult and even painful at times, our relationship has grown even stronger, and I feel that I have developed some tips that could help other men or women in similar situations.
The first thing that my boyfriend and I realized when I got to school was that we needed to make a bigger effort to communicate. At home, it was much easier to stay up-to-date on the things that we were doing and who we were hanging out with. Now, we have to make sure we keep each other clued-in about our new friends, our classes, our happiness, and our hardships.
In order to make this work, we talk on the phone or use FaceTime quite a bit. For example, I’ll call him to keep me company when I’m making the thirty-minute trek to or from West Campus. During this time, we can tell each other our plans for the day or anything else we’ve been meaning to tell each other. At night or during homework breaks, we will FaceTime each other and do the same thing. We also make sure to say goodnight over FaceTime as much as possible. I cherish those phone calls because that’s the closest we get to hang out since I’ve been at school.
When you’re only seeing each other over the phone, it can be difficult to keep up the romance. To remedy this, text your significant other when you’re thinking of them, just to brighten their day. Send them some cute-but-cringey tweets or Snapchats every once in a while. Look through old photos and tell them you love thinking of all your great memories together.
Since you and your girlfriend or boyfriend are used to being able to show affection in person, it can be easy to forget to do it over text or the phone, but it’s important for keeping your relationship healthy. Make sure that the other person never forgets how much you love them, and reassure them often.
Arguably the most important tip for long-distance dating is having something to look forward to. This is incredibly helpful when both people get upset and simply want to be able to see each other. When you feel this way, it’s beneficial to focus your attention away from the sadness and onto the anticipation of seeing each other the next time.
For my relationship, that highly anticipated time is Thanksgiving break, because my boyfriend is coming to Boston to visit me and spend Thanksgiving with the extended family I have here. Needless to say, we are totally thrilled that it’s finally here!
No matter what other people may tell you, long distance is worth it. Take it from me, someone who is in a happy and healthy long-term and long-distance relationship. As long as you and your partner are dedicated to each other and willing to work a little bit harder for love, there is nothing standing in your way.
Keep these things in mind if you or someone you know is in a long distance relationship, and I wish you and your partners all the best!
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