As an introvert, coming to college has been an enormous shift for me because I can no longer lock myself in my room for 10 hours to escape social interactions. The issue is that if I did lock the door, now another person would still be in my room.
It is challenging to navigate how to prioritize my introverted needs when I am situated in an environment that makes it harder for me to do so, which is why I have crafted a list of tips on how to live with a roommate as an introvert:
- Make Your Own Friend Group
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If you want to have the opportunity to be alone, then the key to having that chance is to be in a different friend group than your roommate. If your roommate has their own friend group, that gives you more opportunities to be in your room alone since your schedules won’t align socially. Also, your friends might allow you to stay in their dorm if you need peace and quiet when they aren’t home. You might also be lucky and find some people that don’t drain you socially, and you can just sit with them and do nothing. I’ve found those people, and I would much rather sit in their dorm with them than by myself in my room.
- Set Boundaries
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You should be having a conversation with your roommate about specific needs as soon as possible. To create a healthy relationship with your roommate, you should communicate the following: what to do when you want to be alone, what each other’s schedules look like so there is some peace in the room, always ask if you want guests over, and how to mentally support each other in any situation. Not only will this be a weight lifted off your shoulders since you now know how your roommate feels about specific conditions, but you can also come back to this conversation if they are not following the boundaries you agreed upon. Communication is key to a healthy roommate relationship.
- Find Things to Do Alone
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Sometimes it will be difficult to have the opportunity to be alone in the dorm, so it is important to be able to find things to do outside your room that can help you. Finding hobbies, such as reading, walking, or painting, is essential for thriving in college. My favorite things to do are going on walks, sitting on a bench, and reading or listening to music. Also, going to the library is a nice break from socializing since everyone there is focused on their work.
- Invest In Some Good Headphones
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Noise-canceling headphones are the key to happiness as an introvert. Investing in some good headphones will allow you to feel completely alone, especially if you play some white/gray noise on your phone. Having headphones will allow you to be in your own world and semi-alone in a room with other people.
Living with a roommate can be challenging enough, but it is much more difficult when you socially recharge through being alone.
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