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How to Get Sick

I have been pretty sick for the past two weeks.  Needless to say this has been irritating.  It has made it harder for me to do my schoolwork, be a happy person, and just live life overall.  I decided to pinpoint the things I could have done differently to prevent me from being in this position.  So if you want to be as sick as I am, do the following:
 
1.  Go out every night of the weekend.  Do me a favor next time you go to a party, and take a good look around you.  It can be pretty disgusting.  Sharing red Solo cups, and shot glasses.  Being in a basement full of sweaty people.  Hooking up with some random guy who may or may not be sick/gross.  Parties are a prime place for germs to spread.  Beware.

2. Take showers in the community bathroom.  As I was showering in the community bathroom the other morning, I had a minor panic attack.  I thought of how many other people showered there.  I realized I couldn’t possibly know all of their habits.  I understand for me and many others, using a community bathroom is not an option.  But you can be safe about it.  Clean up after yourself.  Wash your hands after touching ANYTHING.  And please, for the love of all that is holy, do not shower barefoot.

3. Stay up all night watching Netflix.  There is nothing that I’d rather waste my time on than Netflix.  I will watch movies I’ve never heard of, and start watching television shows I never before had an interest in.  The problem is, with all this entertainment at my disposal, I find it really hard at night to put the Netflix away and go to sleep.  But trust me, you will never regret forgoing all the fun Netflix has to offer the next morning.  Rest is important in maintaining one’s health.

4. Eat lots of junk food.  Staying up late to finish an essay and study for a big test is easier with food.  Nothing is better study food than a BU platter from Late Nite, or a box of Domino’s Cheesy Bread (but I won’t go off on that again).  I mean, who wants to stay up late with a bunch of grapes and a bottle of water?  But really, avoid eating crappy food if you can. 

5. Drink a ton of coffee.  I got to a point where I realized that all I was drinking throughout the day was coffee.  I was just trying to stay awake for all my classes, and to do all my work.  Consequentially I wasn’t drinking any water or juice.  Coffee may help you stay awake for a few hours, but it is not going to help you get over your cold!
 
 

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