Over the weekend, I had a traumatic experience after using a rideshare app by myself. Luckily, I am here to tell the story. However, it made me deeply aware of what can go on in our world and how dangerous some people are. I have been hearing countless stories lately about women being assaulted, kidnapped, and harmed at the hands of men. Naively and quite arrogantly so, I never worried about any of this. I saw myself as a badass and an independent woman who could navigate herself out of any situation. It wasn’t until I was confronted with a horrible situation that I realized that bad things do happen, and as women, we must be prepared to equip ourselves against them.
- Always have a close friend know where you are
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It is so important for someone you know and trust to know where you are, especially if you are walking or riding somewhere alone, and especially at night. Someone in your area should be aware of your starting point, destination, and the time it takes to get there. A bonus is staying on the phone with that contact throughout your trip as well, for extra security.
- Use a buddy system
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It is horrific that women cannot feel safe enough to do things on their own, yet the reality is, if you are in certain situations, it simply is far safer to have a buddy. If you are going anywhere late at night or after it’s dark, it’s always smart to have someone walk with you to your destination or ride with you in a rideshare car—or on public transportation. This isn’t always doable or realistic, but if it’s possible, you should really try to always use a buddy system.
- Carry something to defend yourself
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A lot of states have specific laws about this, including Massachusetts, yet for self-defense purposes if it is legally okay, a woman should definitely try to carry some form of pepper spray or mace. Again, you have to be careful about wielding such a thing, because it can be harmful when not properly utilized. However, if your state allows it, it is highly recommended that you purchase something like pepper spray just for extra security, or in the case of an urgent emergency where you must defend yourself.
- Sleepover at a friend’s house if it is late or if you are intoxicated
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It’s college. People want to go out late and have fun—and they should be allowed to if they’re of age! However, do it safely and carefully. When people drink, their inhibitions are lowered and they may not be able to defend themselves against attackers. If you are out with your friends or drinking at someone’s home or apartment, just make a plan earlier in the night to stay over until the morning, so that when you leave you are fully sober with your wits about you. Being intoxicated can leave women extremely vulnerable, especially if they’re making their way home alone late at night.
- Trust your instincts and intuition
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If something feels off, wrong or weird to you, trust that instinct. You, as a human being, have instincts for a reason. We have a natural reaction when things are wrong. If you feel that something is off wherever you are, or someone poses a threat, trust that feeling. Don’t hesitate; don’t think you’re crazy—because unfortunately more than often you are 100% right about those instincts. Trust yourself. And anyway, it’s better to be safe than sorry.
- Check the locks on car doors and keep your windows cracked
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If you simply have to travel alone in a rideshare app at night, make sure that before you close the door on the car, there are no child locks or other kinds of locks that could trap you in the vehicle. It also doesn’t hurt to crack or open a window as soon as you get in—God forbid you had to yell for help—you could if the window were open.
There was a time when I thought, naively so, that I was invincible. Now, I know better. I love my life and want to live it to the fullest, however, I want to do so safely. As a woman, there are simply some hard facts we have to face, and that hurts so much to admit because we shouldn’t have to live in a state of anxiety. One day, hopefully, that will change, but until then, we must be diligent, aware, and cautious.
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