Have you ever finished a book, movie, or television show and thought, wow, maybe there really are good men out there? Well, I have.
The creation of fictional men in romance media has instilled in (primarily) young women’s minds that men like them actually exist, when in reality they do not. Although a small number of men may possess similar characteristics and qualities to these fictional men, it’s usually very rare.
Women can watch heaps of fictional men across different streaming platforms who are understanding, communicative, and genuine toward the person they are pursuing. This leads women to expect men in real life to show the same qualities as the men in movies and shows. This expectation is often never met to its full potential amongst men, even when it’s the bare minimum.
Women constantly have to minimize their own wants and needs in relationships to match what the person they like can provide them. It’s more often than not on the man for not being able to understand and follow through on what their partner is asking of them.
On top of that, women have been told constantly by both the general public and people in their lives that they need to lower their expectations to find someone. Weird how no one ever tells a man that, though? Men can pursue the person they want and not worry about lowering their expectations because women can (usually) always accommodate what’s asked of them. After all, they’re used to that behavior.
It’s really disheartening to see women settling for what they believe they deserve just because they want to be with someone. All women deserve someone who can exude the same healthy masculinity portrayed by the men in the shows or movies they love watching.
Garrett Graham, a fictional college hockey player from the show Off Campus, was widely received by the public as a good guy and a good boyfriend. Throughout the season, Garrett shows vulnerability, healthy masculinity, and genuineness toward not only his hockey friends but also his girlfriend.
Garrett is the stereotypical college hockey player with more girls on his phone than he has time for. Viewers could watch his actions and compare him to real-life men before his character development once he began dating his girlfriend.
Seeing a recovered playboy turn into a secure, healthy boyfriend for his music-major girlfriend is not something many would see in real life, and this once again raises the expectations among women. Fictional men let women experience how much of an impact positive masculinity has on men as a whole.
With all of this in mind, it’s worth noting that seeking the characteristics of a good guy in media and fiction shouldn’t be normalized. Women shouldn’t have to only see good guys in a fictional world rather than the real one.
Men should be able to behave as positively as they are portrayed in media.
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