It’s been nearly 1 month since our last overheard article was published and frankly I’m having mixed emotions. Ebbing and flowing between embarrassment and gratitude for the weirdos who grace our campus. Needing no introduction, here’re some words from Brown’s finest:
Seeing the bright side:
*Cracks iPhone screen*
“You know what, at least I didn’t break my emotional screen”
*the first sunny day of the year*:
“The seasonal depresh is goneee right now”
When you friend hooks up with someone in ROTC:
“I feel like he’s the type to have you call his dick ‘The General’”
From one ‘friend’ to another:
“Your grandpa’s death came during the most inconvenient week for me, you know, work wise”
Did someone say weird kink?:
*girl showing her friends the saber-toothed tiger from ice age *
“Come on guys, you can’t tell me you don’t see the sex appeal”
Taking charge:
“I’m not going to let a fucking beta antagonize my sex life”
*Coronavirus*:
Girl 1: “How’s the work coming?”
Girl 2: “Not good. It’s hard to get work done when the world’s ending”
When you really don’t wanna go home:
“My cousin has a lake house?”
When you’re wondering whether to late-night that guy one last time:
“This is not the time to be building relationships it’s the time to be burning bridges”
The hookup culture that plagues our generation:
“I don’t know if they’re dating but they’re very much out in the daylight together”
When you just can’t get any more boujee:
“This girl is peak búxtón”