One Size Does NOT Fit All

...especially when it comes to friendship!

We all know that all friendships take love, dedication, and time.  But sometimes, after putting in so much effort, we forget that each of our friends are individuals who need personalized TLC.

People tend to focus on themselves and this can often leak over into the way we handle our relationships.  Even when we have the best intentions, it’s easy to get caught up in what we would want from a friend instead of putting ourselves in our friends’ shoes.

Just as an example, some people crave physical affection when they’re feeling down, and for others, physical affection is their worst nightmare when they’re in a bad mood. When “touchy” people see their friend crying, it may be their first impulse to offer them a hug, even if their friend would dislike nothing more… yikes!

 

To help ease the challenge we have some tips (surprise!!) for all y’all at home:

  1. Be straight up and just ASK your friend for their preferred mode of treatment! Our favorite line is “shall I distract or should we talk it through?”  This opens the opportunity for your friend to voice her opinion without feeling needy or awkward. Who doesn’t love a lil’ healthy communication?

  1. Keep mental (or extra points if they’re written) notes of things you found especially successful in cheering your friend up.  Even though it may not work a second time, your friend will definitely be impressed that you took the time to remember that they hate chocolate (which might cause other issues in your friendship tbh) and fruit is the way to go, or that when he’s upset he needs a good ol’ distraction.  

  1. Seek them out! Some friends need to be reminded (even via text) that you’re there for them and thinking of ‘em.  Checking in with your friend is a great way to make them feel cared for. Especially if you personalize what you say when you check in.

 

 

So to sum up, just remember: your friends aren’t all just like you (and that’s a good thing!), so the way you show your love for them should be personalized too :)