There are few better insights into someone’s personality than looking at the way she or he answers questions. Asking people what they would bring with them to a deserted island is a telltale way to find out their prized possessions, secret obsessions, and quirks. It can sometimes even reveal things about your closest friends that you would never otherwise know. Part personality test, part random questionnaire, and with a nod to Bowdoin alum and the first explorer to reach the North Pole Robert E. Peary, comes Stranded at the North Pole. A weekly profile of different Bowdoin students, as if it was just the two of us wrapped in fur coats sipping on hot cocoa in a dog sled. Sometimes serious, sometimes frivolous, but always entertaining, this questionnaire aims to familiarize you with faces that you might see walking across the quad or sitting in a back booth at Moulton.
Today, I am stranded at the North Pole with sophomore, Fred Ellzey…
The holiday season is upon us. What is your favorite holiday, and how would you celebrate it if stranded at the North Pole?
My birthday is September 1st, and I consider it a big holiday (in my book at least). If stranded at the North Pole, I would like to take a ride on a polar bear and have a massive snowball fight with all my friends, where I just throw snowballs at them and they just take it. Then I’d make an ice sculpture with my name on it. That’s it. I’m a simple guy, I guess. That would be epic.
What Bowdoin-catered meal could you subsist on during winter hibernation?
For soup, it would have to be the pepper bacon soup– I love that. For my main course, I’d have to say the Southwest chicken, mainly because it has bacon in it. I love bacon, it’s kind of sad… I tried to be a vegetarian when I came to Bowdoin. I lasted for like a month, and then Moulton had bacon one day and I couldn’t resist it. I just got a plate full of bacon. It was one of my highlights here at Bowdoin… no judging, please. I’m obsessed with bacon. For dessert, I’d have to say an Oreo milkshake– I make them on Sundays. I just get a cup, put the vanilla ice cream in it, then add the Oreo toppings, add another scoop of ice cream and put it in the microwave. It softens it up and it’s delicious.
Tell us about the Meddiebempster’s Bad Romance performance.
When I auditioned for the song I didn’t think I would get it, because when George Aumoithe sang it I was blown away. But then I sang the song and everyone enjoyed it, and when everyone came to vote it was split in half between me and George. But prior to auditioning I already knew the dance because I’m a hard-core Lady Gaga fan. I have her demo from New York from before she was signed. I’m obsessed with her. But my favorite Meddies performance was when we went to Wellesley College. We all had to dress up because it was Halloween, and I was dressed up as a prostitute from the 1970s. I was wearing an afro, a Meddie’s shirt tied up in the front, some extra short-shorts and fishnets, and I had a heel in my hand. The girls enjoyed it.
If you could be stranded at the North Pole with one Bowdoin professor, one celebrity, one historical figure, and one friend, whom would you choose?
The professor would be Peter Coviello, because he is awesome and crazy at the same time. For a famous person: my girl Beyoncé, because it’s Beyoncé. That’s all I have to say. We’d probably just be dancing there together and doing choreography together. My historical figure might be kind of controversial, but I’d say Jesus. I’d like him to explain how he created the whole thing, the whole process. I’d ask him just to tell me everything. [Laughs] And then I’d say my best friend Allen. We’ve been friends since 5th grade. Coviello, Jesus, Beyoncé, and Allen – yep, I’ll keep that.
Describe how you would spend your day if you were stuck on the North Pole for 24 hours.
Half of the time I would be sleeping, then for the rest I’d be making snowmen, because I enjoy making snowmen, and then I would go searching for Santa’s workshop. I’d like to spend time with his wife, I think she’d be pretty chill.