Feminism is in the limelight more and more recently, but it should not be seen as a “trend” that will fade away like those feather fair clips from last season. Celebrities far and wide are bringing the issue of equality up all over and all the time. Orange is the New Black actress Laverne Cox has heralded as an icon for trans women and women of color. Matt McGorry has identified himself as a feminist. Funny women Tina Fey, Amy Pohler, J Law, and Amy Schumer are some other big names that are making some bug noises about the pay gap and criticism women receive when they bring up the issue of representation. Fey especially received some gripe earlier this past year with the announcement of the all female cast of a Ghostbusters reboot (set to release later this summer). As always, queens Beyonce, Nicki, and FLOTUS Michelle Obama are a media favorite, and always have pointed out not only the lack of representation and equality of women, but that especially of black women in particular.
More and more people are identifying as feminist today. Is your partner okay with identifying as one? If so, they are probably a keeper, otherwise, there may be some things you may need to work on before moving forward into anything more serious. Here’s how to tell…
He’s Fetty Wap in the Kitchen
If your man is in the kitchen cookin’ pies with you, and doesn’t mind helping out around the house, he doesn’t follow typical gender roles. He respects you as an equal and won’t feel threatened if you change your own car tires or step on what other douchier guys would consider to be only their domain.
No Macho Bull Shit
Is your SO afraid of drinking “girly” drinks or doing “girly” things with you? If the guy you’re seeing is afraid of bubble baths, being seen with a martini, or possibly buying tampons (if you’re serious), that could be a red flag. The idea that enjoying certain things or trying things that you enjoy (hello, pumpkin spice latte) somehow makes him “less than” a man is disturbing. If enjoying those things will make him a wuss and therefore weak, that is intentionally suggesting that you are also somehow weaker for enjoying those things as well. Sound dumb? It is. “If martinis make you gay, who would want to be straight?!”
You’re Queen… so is Mom
How someone treats their parents can be a good indicator of how they will treat someone in a relationship. There’s a huge difference between “mama’s boy” and respecting your mom though. Depending on their mom for everything- as in “where’s my shirt?” and leaving dirty dishes in the sink not only screams man-child but may show a lack of respect for women. If your SO is serious about the relationship- and you- watch Mom. Did he remember her birthday or did he grab a card at the gas station and do it half-assed? It might be something to keep in mind.
He punches Sexism in the Face
Okay, he may not have to actually punch someone in the face, but guys who are still laughing at “get back in the kitchen” or wearing “cool story babe” shirts are probably not the best boyfriends. If that’s your relationship status, look out. Someone who dismisses you when you tell them how your day went of dismisses your interest with a crude (not to mention stupid) joke will also dismiss you on more serious matters later on as well. If your guys is more mature and dismisses remarks like these from others and jumps to your defense though? Win!