For most of my life, I have been a homebody. I have always preferred to stay in, watching TV and drinking hot tea, while everyone else went out. Once I started college, this quickly changed. I wanted to go out, whether that be a frat party, bar, or just dinner downtown, all of the time. I changed many of my stay-at-home habits, including doing homework in the library and reading on the Dickinson quad. I was a social butterfly.
That was until COVID hit. Once we all went home, I lost all of that energy to be extroverted and retreated into my safe space. As things start to get back to normal, this introverted attitude has caused some issues for me. Although I am drained from the social activities of the day and am not as excited to continue into the night, I still attempt to go out as much as I possibly can. I’m usually tired, boring, and not in a good mood. To be honest, it’s because I no longer find it as fun or exciting, and I’m just going because I don’t want to miss out on something. This is the dreaded college FOMO or fear of missing out. I’m constantly stressed that I am going to miss out on an iconic moment or funny story that I am putting going out before my wants and needs.
FOMO isn’t a joke. It can affect your self-esteem, and make you feel jealous of other people’s lives or possessions. One of the big reasons FOMO is at an all-time high right now is due to social media. Everybody is bombarded with everyone else’s lives, whether it be their promotions at work on Facebook, their vacations beach pics on Instagram, or even just a Snapchat story from their Thursday night out on State Street. How can we not be jealous when we see everyone else’s amazing lives in high definition? This happens to me quite often. I’ll see pictures from a mixer I just couldn’t bring myself to attend, and be overwhelmed with emotions about missing it. Thankfully I have found some great ways to help overcome these emotions, so I can enjoy my time in and out of the house.
First, it’s important to remind yourself how grateful you are for the times you do have. Make a scrapbook of your favorite pictures from the theme party or write a journal entry about your best bar night. Whenever you are feeling stressed and envious of other people’s lives you can look to these things to help remind you that you have a lot to be grateful for.
Next, focus on what you really think is important and plan around it. If going out to frat parties is crucial to your college experience, make sure you plan your days so you have time for this. Get a good amount of sleep the night before, get homework done and spend time taking care of yourself before the party. If you plan for what you want, you can kiss FOMO behind, because you’ll have the time and ability to attend whatever you want.
Lastly, don’t change yourself to fit others and make real connections. Don’t hang around people who constantly brag about the things they’ve done or what they own. Build friendships with people who share many of your interests, so you always feel a connection and never miss out. If you don’t feel like going out with one group of friends that night, maybe go catch a movie with a different group. Don’t worry about missing out, because you will be doing something fun as well!