Imaginative, Disciplined, Passionate, Authentic, and Athletic. Those are the top five words that I believe best characterize me, from how I view myself before the opinions of others.
I am imaginative because I often fantasize and dream of my future goals and aspirations. I score high as a visual learner over auditory and kinesthetic. I am a big-picture person and focus on the vision rather than going through the motions of everyday tasks. At my core, I am musically inclined. When I was seven years old, every Tuesday afternoon, my mother would pull into Robbie Music Store’s parking lot, where I would walk into a plethora of instruments, and she would “have to drag me out of the isles” to get me to my music lessons on time. Always 6 PM, I never missed a vocal class or a piano or guitar class (I also played the flute and violin). It was hard, though, to keep away from all the Martins, Parlors, Classical, Gypsy Jazz, and Auditorium guitars. After a day in the shop, I would go home, run through the garage, sprint to my father’s ancient desktop in his work den, and go on iMovie. I would spend hours editing clips that I took from directing skits and music videos of my friends. I would later burn these clips on CDs, call them “movies,” and showcase them to my family (which were also very comical and still extraordinary tear-jerkers).
Before this period, starting when I was four years old, I was doing cartwheels at gymnastics practice and grew to do backhand springs on the balance beam when I was twelve. (Bless my mother for driving me everywhere). At seven years old, I would hop out of the car with my shin guards and cleats on and play recreational soccer all through high school. I would spend half the year training on the swim team from high school onward to college. I have always preferred staying on my feet, which is why I consider myself athletic.
I was raised in a traditional household, where my father always pushed me to be the best version of myself. He worked late most nights as a Sales Executive and traveled many weeks at a time, so the evenings when he did come home were spent catching up with my brother and me and having family dinners. He poured a few Merlot glasses in him and talked hour-long conversations each night. During my sophomore year of high school I took the most challenging class (at least in my opinion), Honors Chemistry. It was so difficult. Explaining to him each evening at the table that I spend hours studying for exams, asking my teacher questions during my lunch breaks, learning from my peers who had a knack for science, and watching many videos online on tutorials of the subject. My father still thought I could do better than a B+ in response to the effort. So I kept working consistently to improve my skills in class. Having an older brother ranked fourth in his high school class, a two-time varsity athlete in track and field and swimming, in student council, and a four-year honor roll student who graduated at Georgia Tech for biomedical engineering also encouraged me to stay on my A-game and remain disciplined.
Being in college now, however, I find it easier to remain disciplined in the areas I am most passionate about. I am running two clubs as president — one being HerCampus, and I devote my time because writing, public relations, and marketing are areas that light a fire in me. I love creating content, managing brand partnerships, collaborating with other chapters and organizations, planning and executing events, and finding creative ways on social media to maximize our reach, engagement, and website clicks.
Despite my father’s unbending parenting style, he taught me the most valuable lesson; to always stay authentic. I can recall recently speaking to my dad on the phone and telling him that I was nervous about an interview for a job that I have always wanted. He tells me, “people can sense others who are not genuine. You know yourself, so just be yourself, and it will all fall into place”. That quote has been said to me through and through since I was in elementary school. That’s why I feel that my friends can confide in me because they know I will be able to give them my honesty and genuine energy.
Now, when I asked my friends, “if you could describe me in a few words, what would they be?” here are the common responses I received:
- Smart, intelligent, driven
- Graceful, beautiful, classy
- Nice, caring, supportive
- “Dresses so nice.”
- “I literally laugh all the time when we are together.”
- “A girl boss.”
- Super outgoing, positive. “She’s really cool.”
- “Good at making everyone in a group feel included.”
- “Super focused and determined about stuff you’re passionate about.”
- “Creative, full of good ideas.”
- Energetic, warm, compassionate, bubbly. “You match people’s energy.”
- “You wear your heart on your sleeve.”
- “When you love, you love hard.”
- Active
I am surprised to reflect on these responses. It’s interesting how often we view ourselves differently than we are perceived. Sometimes people can identify traits in us that we can’t. The comment “you wear your heart on your sleeve” was something I did not realize because I can’t see my facial reactions all the time (unless I’m looking in a mirror), but others can from an outsider’s view. Wearing my heart on my sleeve can be a good thing because it means I am open to sharing my emotions, and it helps me communicate more with others. Some of these comments align with what I think of myself which can also mean I am true to myself and others.
While sometimes people can form biased opinions you may like, other times people will form biased opinions that you may not like. For example, during my first year of college, I met a friend that lived in the same residential hall as me and would always invite me to her room to hang out with her other friends. Fast forward a few weeks later, my roommate started going to their room without inviting me, and I felt I would have to invite myself. It wasn’t until my roommate and I were in the bathroom one morning while I was doing my makeup that she mentioned, “yeah, I asked what was going on with that, and she made it clear that she didn’t want to hang out with you anymore.” I froze and just said, “oh.”
Freshman year me took it pretty hard; at the moment, I was entirely blindsided by the situation and our friendship. My roommate followed up and said, “It’s okay, though, it’s our freshman year, and the point is for us to meet people and figure out who we want close in our life.” Which is true. Reflecting on that experience, it was for the better, and there wasn’t anything personal about it. She and I are still friendly, just not best friends.
People will love you, and others will not, and you have to accept that because the opinions of others are not something that you can control. What you can control is knowing yourself and your value. I’ve come to an understanding of that principle by staying true to my authentic-self. Once I accepted who I was, I also started to accept those who don’t, like the girl in my example.
The ones that stick around are the ones who are meant to lift you and highlight your strengths. Your strengths serve a purpose in this world in some way or another, and sometimes people see our weaknesses that overshadows our strengths. Once I accepted my weaknesses, I promised I will work to continuously turn them into strengths.
The best leaders in this world always make it a point to keep building on their skill sets. We’re only in college, so we have infinite time to keep working on ourselves. Once one milestone is achieved, it’s vital to continually reflect on the experience and ask ourselves, “what went right?” and, importantly, “what went wrong?” to make changes so that we can learn and grow from it.
I will end this with a quote:
“In a world that is constantly changing, there is no one subject or set of subjects that will serve you for the foreseeable future, let alone for the rest of your life. The most important skill to acquire now is learning how to learn.”
– John Naisbitt
You can always grow to be better. So I challenge you to accept yourself, acknowledge your worth, and always make an effort to work on yourself. But most importantly, always learn from your experiences.