Underwear. Panties. Unmentionables. Everybody (hopefully) wears them and every girl has a distinct pair for several types of days. Over winter break, I spent some time purging my drawers and closet collecting clothes to get rid of or give away. But while I was cleaning through my socks, bras, and undies, I found myself totally overwhelmed with the types of underwear I have. After discussing this phenomenon with my girlfriends, we came to the conclusion that there are 6 types every girl must have, and I’m pretty sure you collegiettes will agree:
The Laundry Day Pair
The ones that are at the back of your dresser drawer: the laundry day pair is not cute, not comfortable, and most likely not the right size. They are your last resort because the rest of your underwear is piled up in your laundry basket. And, because they are so god awful, they’re most likely your motivation to actually get out of bed and do a load of laundry.
The Way-Too-Old Pair
You have no idea why you still own this pair of underwear. They probably have a day of the week printed on them, the elastic band is definitely unraveling, and they might even have a hole or two in them. You should have thrown them out years ago, and definitely shouldn’t have brought them with you to school, but for some sentimental reason that you’re probably not even able to remember, you’re holding onto the way-too-old pair at least until graduation.
The Period Pair
This pair serves no purpose other than for that time of the month when you feel like you’re going to die. They are designated for this week because they’re comfortable enough to wear while lying on your couch and eating chocolate, but ugly enough that you wouldn’t want to let anyone ever find out you own them. Often interchangeable with the laundry day pair, the period pair are essential to every girl’s underwear drawer.
The “I’ve Literally Worn These Once” Pair
Otherwise known as “fancy panties,” the “I’ve Literally Worn These Once” pair is kind of like special occasion underwear. They’re not comfortable in the slightest; they were way too expensive for having so little material; and like the name says, they almost never get worn. They are likely the pair you wear right before you get stuck with the laundry day pair, unless you’re lucky enough to have a hot date in your near future.
The Pair From The Pack
No one knows you own these; you’ve probably even lied and said you don’t. You probably bought them at Target; you probably thought they were one style and they were actually another. They came in a set of three, and they go up to your belly button. Hanes made them to make shopping for underwear easier, and you probably bought them under extreme circumstances (Read: you went on vacation and forgot to pack underwear). You never wear them, but they saved you in a sticky situation and they’re still taking up space in your drawer.
The Sleep Pair
The most basic and fundamental of the pairs, every girl has a few pairs of panties that are specifically for curling up in bed and sleeping. If you are the type of girl who actually enjoys sleeping in thongs, please contact me because I both respect and am very confused by you. The sleep pair is full-butt, made of the softest material on planet Earth, and rarely sees the outside world.