This is the second part of a 2-part story. See here for “Getting Perspective: Girls and the Hookup Culture” to read the girls’ answers to these questions!
Women of Boston College, don’t act like we’re ignorant of what you call us men behind our backs. Let’s face it: BC bros can be assholes. Hook-up hounds, if you will.
It’s why professors from the sociology department give talks almost monthly about our dating habits, or lack thereof. It’s why guys just CANNOT be seen in a sweatshirt and athletic shorts combo when going out on weekends (although cut-off jerseys with the shorts do fly).
But despite what the majority say, feel, or do, there are some who believe in a solid dating culture and are just as disappointed in your gender for going along with BC’s reputation and not fighting back. Didn’t John Mayer say that “two were better than one,” and boy is he ever a hunk. Point proven.
The following four young male students are Eagles through and through. Each is a representative of his respective class here at BC. None of them are currently in a relationship, and you will never be able to find them because we took out names so you can’t Facebook stalk these bro-mantic desperados.
So, take this quick look at the male mind and thank Her Campus for allowing some anonymity so that these boys can keep their humility while also providing you ladies with some thoughts for deep reflection.
1) What’s your idea of a perfect date?
“A dinner at a nice restaurant during which good conversation never stops. After, we can walk around the city, stop somewhere for dessert and coffee, and head home without a need to be somewhere else.” – Senior
“Going out on a typical date (movies, dinner) but then ending up doing something completely unplanned by the end of the night.” – Freshman
2) What do you go out looking for on a Friday night?
“In regards to ‘hooking up,’ I don’t go out looking for a hook-up per se. If it happens, it happens. But it’s definitely not the goal of the night. I usually just want to be with my friends, I know that whoever I meet on the weekends is probably not going to lead to anything serious. So yeah, it’s a quick fix, but I’d rather not hurt myself.” – Sophomore
“I’m looking to go out and drink with my friends. I like to be with a bunch of people that I know and am comfortable with, but it’s even more fun when a couple of my friends bring people I haven’t met. You never know, your friend could have a cute girl friend from home or something.” – Junior
3) Why do you think dating is such a rarity?
“Guys and girls alike fear commitment. It’s much easier to spend a few hours and satisfy needs and never talk to the person again. But to put in the time and emotional effort to cultivate a relationship is scary.” – Senior
“Because guys are scared. They don’t want to send a message that is too strong.” – Junior
4) What do you like/dislike about the hook-up culture?
“I don’t like the hook-up culture at all. I have never been a big proponent of my friends or myself hooking up with random people on the weekend. It creates an awkwardness the next time you see that person because you both don’t know what your expectations were from that hook-up. Everything is hidden and things aren’t very transparent. When people talk and open up about what they expect, things don’t just fall apart, they are better equipped to work it out.” – Sophomore
“There’s something to be said for becoming emotionally invested in someone before becoming physically invested.” – Senior
5) Do you feel any regret the next morning?
“Depends on how hot she was.” – Junior
“Depends, the morning means truth and truth is hard to handle sometimes. (Keepin’ that one vague).” – Freshman
“When it happens, I do feel regret the next morning. You sometimes feel like a fool. What did I say? What did I do? Most of the time people can’t even answer those questions because they can’t remember their night. When it happens though, I think about what I did. I just hope I didn’t make a fool of myself.” – Sophomore
6) How quick are you to tell your friends if you hook up with someone?
“The second she walks out of my apartment, I usually go to my roommates’ room. Sometimes, I even introduce my hook-ups to my roommates (they’ll give me a sign if I shouldn’t do it).” – Junior
“Sometimes never, sometimes right away. I mean, I don’t want to brag about anything, but the pat on the back and smile is nice to receive too.” – Freshman
7) Would you rather be in a relationship or part of the hookup culture?
“If I found the right girl, I would definitely rather be in a relationship.” – Junior
“In a relationship, without question.” – Senior
8) What do you look for in hooking up?
“Someone attractive. It comes down to that on the weekends. You don’t have enough time to really get to know someone so it is 100% about the looks.” – Sophomore
“Nothing more than a good time. I don’t see any girl I were to hook up with becoming more than that.” – Freshman
9) What would you do if you “couldn’t get it up?”
“Blame it on the Rubinoff.” – Freshman
“That would be really unfortunate. I imagine I would probably know if that was going to happen going into it. But, I mean I guess if I had to think about it I would have to do everything else until it just happened. There wouldn’t be much I could really do. I would probably have to avoid doing anything that involved giving that fact away.” – Sophomore
10) What matters more? Breast size, or what’s going on in the rear?
“Boobs, butt, boobs, butt… yeah yeah. I mean, of course size matters but whether a big size is necessarily better I’m not convinced, they just need to ‘go together,’ if that makes sense.” – Freshman
“Depends on the guy, I personally get teased by my roommates because I like small boobs. I think we all know that shape and some other attributes are much more important than size. In terms of an ass, I just love a tight ass.” – Junior
So there you have it girls. Hopefully you were a bit surprised. I’m interested to see what your gender has to say to the same questions. Maybe, just maybe, we’ve been wrong about you, too.
Because although with some of these responses they may be joking, representing the very stereotype that has you wishing for an Edy’s pint rather than a Natty Light on a Saturday night, a few of these quotes dig deep into the hearts and feelings of men everywhere.
We like the unexpected, it’s more the fear of commitment than a desire for a one-night stand that is drawing us away from you the night after, and we think wayyyyyy too much about relationships.