I never thought that my first relationship would be a long distance relationship, but now I’ve been dating my best friend from high school for a little over five months. I didn’t start dating until after I graduated from high school, and while I’m still new and learning about relationships, here are some of the perks and drawbacks that I noticed and experienced from being in a long distance relationship.
PERKS:
1. You give each other the space to grow and meet new people.
My boyfriend goes to Umass Amherst while I’m at Babson College. In my experience, I’ve noticed that the couples at Babson tend to always stick around each other, and they don’t necessarily expand their friend group because the couples always spend time with each other. I understand why this happens because I used to do that in high school. I would always hang around the same group of people because they were familiar to me. By going to a different school away from my boyfriend, I’ve had to step out of my comfort zone and meet new people. I’ve met new friends from all over the country and I’ve had some great experiences hanging out with my new friends, which I might not have done if my boyfriend and I went to the same school.
2. You really cherish the dates you go on.
I probably only get to see my boyfriend once a month, but when I do get to see him, I really cherish our time together. We’ll spend a whole day in Boston exploring the city together, trying new foods and visiting new places. I always look forward to our dates, because I get to see him again and spend time with him. Everything in the world feels right again.
3. You always have a supporter just a phone call away.
Bad days happen, and sometimes I just need someone to vent to. My boyfriend and I have scheduled a specific time every day to talk to each other, and during this time, we just talk and listen to each other about our day and we can support each other. It’s really nice to have a supporter just a simple phone call away.
DRAWBACKS:
1. Life and schedules can get hectic.
Sometimes school gets crazy. Team meetings, club meetings, sports, study sessions, etc, can sometimes get in the way of our daily calling time. While we try our best to work around each other’s schedules and be flexible, life gets in the way sometimes and we don’t always get to have the long Facetime conversations that we would like to have.
2. You miss them like crazy.
It’s hard seeing couples on campus sometimes because it reminds me of how much I miss my boyfriend. When I have a bad day, I can’t receive a comforting hug from him or I’m not able to cry on his shoulder. Seeing him on Facetime isn’t the same as seeing him in person.
3. Miscommunication/Jealousy.
Communication is key in any relationship. It’s sometimes hard to see my boyfriend hanging out with other girl friends at his school, and it’s hard to not feel a little jealous inside. While talking about jealousy is a hard and awkward thing to do, it’s important to have a conversation about it. Trusting each other and talking about feelings is important for a healthy relationship.
I was worried when I first started my long distance relationship with my boyfriend. I was worried that it wouldn’t work out and that we would become distant from each other. Many people say that long distance relationships never work out, but I’m hopeful for my relationship. Call me naive, but I believe that good communication, trust, and lots of hugs and kisses can make this relationship last.