She looked through her black-rimmed glasses into the camera. She told me a new day is on the horizon. She told me that speaking my truth is the most powerful tool we have. Oprah said a day will come when we never need to say #metoo again, and I thought, this is important to me. This means something…to me. To me, too.
I think of the times I’ve experienced the realities of life for a woman. Being vigilant–calculating danger– as I am touched by strange men at the bars. Walking home from class, getting honked at, whistled at, and invited to get into the car of a stranger. Juggling mace, an alarm, and my keys between my fingers every time I leave work, just in case I’m not alone. The silence that overcomes me as I am interrupted, ignored, and shut out of conversations when I am the only woman among men–those same men quite interested in my body, my smile, my accommodation of their point of view, but not so much in my intellect, my leadership, my insistence on my own point of view. I think of the times I’ve witnessed these realities in the everyday lives of other women.
Never did I think that I would not have the strength to stand up for myself or other women in these instances of oppression. I never thought that I would be too afraid to say #metoo. Yet, I have stood still in sadness and shame, fearing that my voice wouldn’t be heard. Or worse, that my voice would be heard as distasteful or incorrect. We are, after all, expected to be tolerant and agreeable, chuckling mildly at boys being boys as we remove a stranger’s hand from our bodies or decline propositions from cars.
But I am no longer fearful and I am not agreeable. I am infuriated that our world is so uneasy with female power that it dulls the brightest, the strongest, and the most capable women into silence and appeasement. I am tired of men who say, “Of course I respect women; I have a mom and sisters” as though the role of women in their lives would necessarily preclude coercion, condescension, or callousness on their part–as though a woman’s value results only from her being in relation to a man. I am finished with the unspoken, but certain presumption that women exist primarily to arouse, amuse, or appreciate men.
This is important to me. This means something to me. I am motivated to become the change we so badly need. Speaking our truth is the most powerful tool we have. Women have found the strength to stand up for the dulled, the derided, the dismissed. Well, me too. Those women have inspired me to shed my discomfort. No more silence and no more fear. Time’s up.
I’m standing for strength, solidarity, and sisterhood. I’m standing beside the men I have known all my life who believe in women–in their competence, their wisdom, and their autonomy. I’m standing beside the women who have fought this fight for their entire lives. I’m standing beside the women who have not been given the opportunity to fight. I’m standing for women of color and LGBTQ+ women. For thick women, for working women. For young women and old women. For famous women standing up to speak to millions through a camera lens and for ordinary women standing up to cheer her words and shout #metoo #metoo #metoo
Stand with us. Even when we feel shaky, let’s stand. On our feet, we can see all of the women and men who are with us. On our feet, we can see the hope that lies before us. On our feet, we can see that a new day is on the horizon. It’s a glorious sunrise.