It’s the start to another academic year at Augie. While most students look forward to reuniting with their friends, some of us are happy to introduce the Class of 2022. Freshmen come in many forms but these are the most common species of freshmen who enroll at Augustana College.
1.)The Camp Counselor
These are the kids who wear lanyards around their necks and backpacks equipped with first aid kits. They have fully memorized the campus map and the student handbook before Week 1. They always show up to their 8:30 classes fifteen minutes early. This type of freshmen takes the time to read every email sent out to the campus so they can absorb more information on what’s going on. Not to mention they’re always helping out their fellow freshmen by giving them directions to an academic building or lending a copy of the campus map. They easily befriend others and know how to make an impression.
2.)The Wanderer
Everyone will be confronted by this kind of freshmen at some point during their time in college. They may approach you and ask where the bookstore is or how to get to the mailing center. Even with a map on hand, they still struggle navigating through campus. If they’re late to class, it’s probably because they got lost on the way.
3.)The Escaped Zoo Animal
If you’re walking behind someone blasting speakers from their backpack, you most likely have encountered this freshmen breed. Usually, they travel in herds to parties or the bars trying to impress the upperclassmen with their “savagery”. They’re so consumed with the freedom of being away from parents that they think they can do whatever they want without consequences. You can find them hungover during their FYI class (LSFY if you’re old like me) or loitering outside Smokin’ Joe’s showing off their fake I.D.’s among other underage friends.
4.)The Pureblood Chicagoan
Yes, I’m talking about the children who say they originate from Chicago when they’re really from a suburb that’s an hour drive from the actual city. The Bean is their place of worship and they claim they were baptized at North Avenue Beach. Over the summer, they celebrated the local holiday, Lollapalooza, and spammed social media with all the gigs they attended and most likely complaining about the town of Rock Island. If you’re talking to someone and they can’t shut up about how amazing Chicago is and how much they miss Portillo’s, you met a Pureblood Chicagoan.
5.)The Social Butterfly
This freshman has one mission and one mission only: to get involved on campus as much as possible. At the Activities Fair, they’re writing their email on every signup sheet and somehow showing up to every club meeting. Not only do they plan on rushing and pledging, but they can’t decide which Greek group to Pref because they love them all. They’re always waving hi to anyone passing by out on the Quad and love striking conversations with the faculty, especially the CSL dining staff. They’ll sit with anyone at the CSL so they can make more friends. The Augie Bubble is their bubble.