If you’ve been following my growth into my early 20s, you know that I’ve just recently moved on my own, and the things I’ve learned about myself, adult life, and navigating employment. We all are familiar with hearing random noises in our homes at night, and fearing someone broke in and you were about to meet your worst nightmare. I want to remind you that this fear NEVER fades away. I personally am already an anxious person who despises being startled. Sweaty hands, shaky knees, and wide eyes are not my favorite accessories personally.
On the other hand, Halloween is one of my favorite holidays in the main sight of creativity of everyone around. Kids dress up as their favorite superhero, dream job, and even their favorite animal. Adults wear fun costumes that are unique to their sense of humor. Even your co-workers are in on making the office party one to remember. The freeing parties and personalities are eye-opening in that even the most closed-off of people you know become outlandish in their behavior.
I also love to read books and immerse myself in something outside my life, and I’ve recently found myself more and more interested in the history of Halloween. The holiday itself is fascinating, but I’ll let you conduct your own research. The following holidays are equally as enticing and keep the spooky feelings around for a few more days.
But back to my side-eyed glare at scary movies. I am one to never choose a scary movie by personal choice. Growing up, my friends and brother would always force me to watch their jump-scare, loud noise, and eye-covering movies without any choice to refuse. While I was friends with older people and my brother is four years ahead of me, I was always picked on, pranked, and tormented because it was funny to see me be upset. While scaring me as I rounded a corner or dumping cold water on my head while in the shower was normal, it never was something I was used to and would have the same reaction as the last. Almost like it was the first time.
Anyways, back to movies and less of exposing my childhood. I do not enjoy being the only person screaming in a movie theatre that’s full of people I do not know. Nothing like the fear of spilling your popcorn on the teenage couple in front of you to jumpstart your heart for your night. While I work in a restaurant and loud noises no longer scare me quite the same, I still am a person that fears small noises in my home at night. Granted, I live with two cats and it is more than likely them, but I still fear something even worse. Scary movies just add to the fear, and then I’m on TikTok for three hours just trying to distract myself. Let’s be honest, it works for like, five minutes, and then we’re right back on our cycle of starting at my handheld LED screen and beautiful internet.
I am one to never enjoy being scared and I think it stems mainly from my brother and older friends being the ones to make sure I was always on my toes. While I think that it also emerges from the fact that living alone is tough, and with no parents coming home from dinner to put reality into you, there is a little more bravery and courage to investigate what you’re questioning.