Edited By: Tanvi Singh
Based on your relationship status this Valentine’s Day, you’re probably going to resemble one of the following:
- Lawful Good– Madly in Love
Nobody is more excited for Valentine’s Day than this person. They are in a relationship that is so perfect it seems almost fake, and they’ve probably been planning for Valentine’s Day since December. They don’t just have a singular surprise for their partner, they have an entire itinerary for the day, beginning with a handmade breakfast and ending with a candlelit dinner.
Their partner is either just like them, or is extremely chill and has no big plans for V-day. Either way, I hope this couple gets married soon.
- Lawful Neutral: The Galentines Gang
My personal favourite, this is a gang of girlies who are all single this Valentine’s Day. These ladies have decided to make the best out of the situation, and have lots of fun plans for the day. I’d like to imagine that they’d all wear matching outfits during the day and at night there’d be plans for a group pasta-cooking-and-eating date.
There is nothing better than women loving each other and taking every opportunity to show appreciation for each other.
- Lawful Evil: Recently Single
This person just got out of a relationship. The wounds are too fresh for them to be doing anything but moping this Valentine’s Day. Their heartbreak manifests in the glares and occasional snide remarks they throw at people who are in happy relationships.
They aren’t actually upset at anyone in a relationship, and they certainly aren’t trying to sabotage any relationships, but they aren’t the most supportive either.
Can you really blame them…?
- Neutral Good: The Chill Couple
This couple is in a very happy and healthy relationship, but both of them are extremely casual about celebrating Valentine’s Day. They are firm believers in the idea that the holiday is a capitalist creation which exists for the sole purpose of pressuring people into spending exorbitant amounts of money on red roses and heart shaped chocolate boxes for their lover.
Why should they profess their undying love to each other on one specific day of the year when they can do it every day?
- True Neutral: Unbothered Icon
This person is single. In fact, they are so single that their entire friend group has been trying to set them up with people left and right, but nothing seems to stick…
This person has reached the ultimate level of unbothered—no amount of canoodling couples can make them feel bad about their singlehood.
A true icon, reminding everyone around them that self-love is the best type of love.
- Neutral Evil: The Fiend
This person is single and not by choice. They are desperate to be in a relationship of any sort. Why they are perpetually single is anybody’s guess, but it’s certainly not for lack of trying. They have a profile on every dating app there is, their friends are being forced to find potential matches for them, they go to every speed dating event there is, but they haven’t yet found the one.
They’re spending this Valentine’s Day alone, just as they spent it last year, and the year before that, and the one before that, and…
They’re a bit of a bummer to be around, but at least they aren’t trying to sabotage those in happy relationships!
- Chaotic Good: Someone’s Stressed Boyfriend
This is someone’s boyfriend who lowkey just forgot that Valentine’s Day was approaching. He figured he would have way more time to plan something. But now he’s cut it too close and is stressing, trying to organise something half decent and cute for his partner. He has a bouquet ordered, but it will be delivered on 15th February, and the pastries he wanted to order are out of stock. This poor guy hasn’t been this panicked in his entire life, and his entire friend group has mobilised to help him plan a heartfelt Valentine’s Day surprise for his partner.
Here’s hoping that he manages to pull it off.
- Chaotic Neutral: Hates People in Relationships
This person hates anything and everything to do with romance. They are sick of watching couples kiss, and hold hands, and back hug each other in the middle of the street. Is their hatred a result of some past heartbreak that left them unwilling to believe in love, or is it because their best friend has abandoned them for a lover? One can’t really say…
All I can say with certainty is that this person is praying for every couple’s downfall and actively scheming to sabotage people’s Valentine’s Day plans with their best friend…
- Chaotic Evil: Is About to Sabotage Every Relationship
Chaotic Evil is Chaotic Neutral’s evil, action-oriented best friend. If Chaotic Neutral is the type to plan petty schemes, Chaotic Evil is the brawn behind the plans who does all the dirty work. They actively work to sabotage people’s Valentine’s Day plans. They aren’t above stealing flower deliveries, eating chocolates that don’t belong to them, or booing couples they pass on the street.
If they have to be miserable this Valentine’s Day, then so does everyone else. Who knows, maybe love can bloom between Chaotic Evil and Chaotic Neutral…?
Soooo, which one are you?