When I first entered the Ashoka campus and saw my peers at the Young India Fellowship Programme, I won’t deny that I was slightly intimidated.
In fact, the words ‘slightly intimidated’ are an understatement. I felt petrified.
Here I was, a young fresh graduate, surrounded by some of the brightest brains of the country. Everywhere I turned, I’d see someone nonchalantly talk about some abstract concept that I never knew existed. Whoever I met had accomplished incredibly spectacular things and still desired to make a greater impact on the world.
And here I was, a young fresh graduate, constantly thinking, “What on earth have I done to have gotten into this programme?”
Was it chance? Was it luck? Was it a mistake? Or…
Did I fool the admissions team into thinking I’m much smarter than I actually am?
This last thought lingered in my mind for a long time. Whatever I’d done so far seemed nothing in comparison to what my peers had done. For the longest while, I felt like I wasn’t worthy enough to be selected for the programme.
However, it turned out that I, like (surprisingly) many of my other peers, was going through something called the ‘Impostor Syndrome’.
Introduced in 1978, impostor syndrome is a psychological pattern wherein a person feels like they haven’t achieved much and therefore, identifies oneself as a fraud who has unwittingly conned people into thinking that they have accomplished a lot in life.
When the research was initially conducted, only high achieving women were considered to be affected by this syndrome. But further research went on to prove that this feeling of impostorism is prevalent in both men and women.
Now, I’m pretty sure that whoever is reading this piece, must have, at some point, felt the same feelings of inadequacy as I did. So, after a lot of googling and trial and-errors, I finally found out five steps to fight the illusion of being impostors.
1. Acknowledge
First of all, you have to acknowledge what you’re feeling at the moment.
Write it in a journal, talk to yourself or simply vent to your friend or family–just express what you’re feeling. Understand your emotions and try to explore why you’re feeling them.
Trust me, when you’ve done that, you’ll automatically start feeling a bit clear-headed.
Then, acknowledge the fact that you must have done something constructive in order to have gotten the opportunities that you did. No matter how many frauds exist in the world, people are capable of recognizing true merit.
2. Stop Comparing
I know it’s really difficult to do this, but you really have to stop comparing yourself with other people.
No matter where you land up, there is always going to be someone who seems to be better at certain things than you are, and you have to accept this fact. Being jealous or petty or sad about it simply won’t cut it.
What you can do, instead, is focus on yourself and your goals. Which brings me to the next step:
3. Set Up Concrete Goals
Now that you’ve done some serious reflection, you have to decide what you want to accomplish in your life.
It could be anything. It could be starting up a new NGO or becoming a CEO. But for whatever it is that you want to do in your life, you have to set up some specific goals and stick to achieving them. Otherwise, all you’re going to do is wallow for the rest of your life.
And given the fact that you have a lot going for you, dear reader, that wouldn’t be too ideal, would it?
4. Break Away From Your Comfort Zone
Eleanor Roosevelt had once said, “Do one thing every day that scares you.”
So, the next step to shake off the feelings of impostorism is by taking up things that challenge you. When you take up challenging tasks, you’ll understand what your strengths truly are, and you’ll get to grow more into the person that you always wanted to be.
5. Reflect
Once you’re done challenging yourself, reflect on what all you’ve achieved.
Make a list of all the interesting things you have done, the learnings you’ve gained and what you want to do after this.
Trust me, once you’ve done that, you’ll feel amazing!
Edited by Vidushi Rijuta