3am at the Bench

Edited by: Sanvi Rawat

Sometimes we meet people who we click with so profoundly, so seamlessly, so effortlessly, that everything finds itself in its place. For me, when I find my people, I see them with a lens very special to me, in the one form of expression that yearns to me. This expression is music; it transcends itself and often flows into my life in the purest,  rawest forms. And when it coincides with things I hold affection for grandly, my puzzle feels solved. Because if there isn’t a song for those moments we share, the lyrics emanating from our phones to deliver the words we feel, then what’s the point of it all? 

One may counter argue that what if the song stays, the memory lives but the person walks away? What if the song difference remains my favorite,but you become indifferent? Ideally, I would say it’s unrealistic to believe people so close to you would just walk away; realistically however, it’s about taking the bet. Because life is just a myriad of all the people you’ve met, all those you’ve loved and all the memories of theirs that stay — possibly because these are things you have control over. 

Now what the future holds, uski toh khabar nahi, but will I still pull out my hopeless romantic bollywood playlist when a group of lovesick kids are jamming together? Yes, I will. Because singing obnoxiously loud with the people who vibe with me as naturally as I do with them, is my definition of happy. For you, it might be something else, maybe it’s a gym session while bustling to rap music because thats the way life goes for you. You could also be the type who yearns for a heart to heart with someone close to you while listening to a CAS playlist. You could be someone who appreciates the little things such as a simple hug when you’re down, or be into crazier things like white girl music while having a ‘get ready with me’ session. Music for you may mean having your own musical performance to a hamilton song or even manifesting yourself into an age-old bollywood dance video channeling your inner senorita. 

However, in all shapes, forms, genres, tones, the falsettos and the bases — music makes me feel less adhoore (incomplete). So, love for me is a playlist with you or a 3am jamming session at the bench. That might not be love for everyone but if we look at it scrutinizingly, don’t all of us carry a pair of headphones everytime we hit the gym, read a book, write a long essay, go on a long drive or find a timepass with our friends?At the end of the day, music is what feelings sound like. 

Eventually, I have come to appreciate songs and associate them with people because the lyrics speak to me dearly. In a world so complex and emotions so overwhelming, to me, it’s a treat if I end up in a music video where the words are transpiring itself into my emotions. So when two people sit closely, heads turned inside and sharing wired headphones—I see love in its purest form, the closeness, the comfort and the feeling to call someone our own. Because, most times, the ears listen to what the heart feels. 

• ASHOKA UNIVERSITY
• music
• perfect vibe
• song titles
• yearning