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Mental Health

Learning to Love Myself by Becoming a “Hot Girl”

If you’re confused by this title, don’t worry, I am too. Never in a million years did I think I would be calling myself “hot” let alone a “hot girl,” yet here I am. Let me explain.


I have not been in a long-term relationship in a long long time. I haven’t dated at all in college, and for someone like me who finds a lot of self-worth in relationships and dating, you can imagine what that has done to my self-image and what I think about myself.


I thought that when I got into college, I would be dating left and right, in and out of relationships like they were nothing. But because I haven’t, I’ve learned something about myself in the process. I need to love myself before I can get even remotely close to letting someone else love me.


This year around the first couple weeks of January, a Tik Tok trend started going around of telling yourself you were “hot” until you convinced yourself you were. It was a nice idea, and it had never occurred to me until then that I never thought of myself in that way before. At twenty-one years old, I still found it hard to deal with the image of myself in my head. So I gave it a shot.


Every day when I woke up and was getting ready, I told myself “you’re hot.” I didn’t like it at first and felt stupid for saying it out loud, but after just a week I started to see the changes. With just a little bit of positive self-talk, I was seeing myself differently. I was doing my makeup every day, and getting dressed up with nowhere to go to feel good about myself and how I looked; not only did I say it, I meant it.


Now, after about a month of this routine, I feel good. I don’t even have to have makeup on, or a nice outfit: I pass the mirror and I am nice to myself and don’t think the thoughts that I used to. If only, for my past self, I’m just so sorry that it took me all this time in college to love myself.


So I guess I’m a “hot girl” now. I’m still an introvert; I don’t think I’m ready to shout out from the rooftops how hot I am yet. I still have a ways to go there, but at least now I know my worth and would feel comfortable in getting into a relationship with someone now. No matter how long it takes I encourage you to try this. You don’t have to do exactly what I did, but positive self-talk can go such a long way.


Tell yourself you are beautiful. Tell yourself you are kind. Tell yourself that you are smart, powerful, brave, and yes, even hot, because you are all those things, and you deserve to be all those things every single second of the day.

Caroline is a senior English major at Appalachian State University concentrating in Film Studies with a minor in Theatre Arts. After she graduates in the spring of 2021, Caroline hopes to either work abroad teaching English as a second language, in the American school system or artistically to pursue creative writing. Caroline has been a member of HerCampus App State since 2019. Along with being its 2020 - 2021 Campus Correspondent, she has also held the positions of Senior Editor, Social Media Director, and was a part of the Campus Trendsetter Program.
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