Thank you bullies, for teaching me something important about myself. I wish I could say the days of being bullied in high school ended long ago. The sad truth is, I am 22 years old, about to graduate college, and I am still facing bullies. This may sound dramatic but I’m not exaggerating when I say my four years in high school were the worst of my life. Long story short, there was a point where I was harassed for months by a girl for no significant reason other than I did not have the same feelings for her best guy friend that he had for me. When he was involved in a fatal car accident, it was somehow my fault and the harassment began.
Can you imagine being walked to class by the school’s police officer for fear that you were going to get cornered and beat up? What about finding out she was hiding in the bathroom all day waiting for you? Even better, you go to the movies with your family and the entire time she’s trying to con the employees into telling her which theater I was in. Eventually the stalking turned into nasty emails and text messages.
I wish you died in that car accident instead.
I wish you would cut your wrist and die.
I’ve never been a confrontational person. The thought of it makes me cringe and sends my anxiety through the roof. All I could do was ignore her messages and try to be invisible during our school day. You can imagine my excitement when graduation finally came and I was off to college! I had never been more excited to become a Mountaineer and find my lifelong friends everyone dreams about. Those dreams were quickly shot down as I experienced the one thing no freshman wants: bad roommates. Within my first semester I had two roommates. Sometimes you meet people and it’s just impossible to form a bond and friendship with, and that is okay. Unfortunately I found myself being bullied yet again. Whispering as I waited for the elevator. Lies being spread around the floor. Why was this happening to me again?
Fast forward to senior year of college as I write this, and I am still facing bullies. I used to feel like a coward for not standing up for myself. I found myself in front of the mirror for hours practicing my “leave me alone” speech only to never follow through and continue with the humiliation each day. This time around, I’ve realized something about myself. It is completely fine that I choose to avoid confrontation. It is my way of dealing with things. Why would I want to stoop down to their level and fight fire with fire? The truth is you are going to face many hurtful people in your life, for short periods of time, or longer than you’d like. You can choose to confront them and hope they stop, or you can hold your head up high and you do you. I’ve learned to focus on myself and avoid all negative things in my life. I read this amazing article the other day on Elite Daily, and this quote is something I’ve been swearing by for quite some time now.
“Everyone’s presence serves a purpose. If someone is bringing only stress to my table, I’d rather eat alone.”