10 Signs it’s Time to Drop Him Like a Bad Habit.
*Due to the nature of the stories and quotes from our readers names have been changed to protect their privacy.
When the two of you first started talking, it was magical. He was the sweetest guy you’d ever talked to, and he made you feel beautiful. Now, things have changed. He’s wishy-washy, and never on time. He’s never straight up with what he wants, unless he’s drunk or looking to score. When you guys are at a party, sometimes, he pretends like you don’t even exist. Your mood is consistently based on whether or not he’s texted you today, because some days, you don’t hear from him at all. If you’re starting to wonder if he’s worth keeping around at all, check it out:
Here are the top ten signs it’s time to drop him like a bad habit (with some extra juicy stories from our readers too!)
1. He doesn’t have time for you.It seems like everything is on his clock right? If you make the plans, he flakes out, but if he makes the plans, it seems to always go smoothly. It’s only convenient for him to hang out when HE has the time (and usually these times are late at night, or three in the morning.) He says that he doesn’t have time to have a relationship right now. This is a huge red flag that you’re being led on. If you’re tired of always waiting…it’s time to drop him.*Kathy, one of our readers, says; “If he doesn’t “have time” for a relationship, it means he doesn’t have time to do anything besides sleep with you.”
(He should be so yesterday.)
2. He just got out of a relationship.
If he just exited a relationship, I hate to tell you but this isn’t basketball, and you shouldn’t be a rebound. (*Snaps*)
3. He loves you when he’s drunk.
If he only “loves” you when he’s drunk this is a bad sign. This isn’t the “druken truth” that you’ve long been awaiting, instead this is the sloppy attempt to dive into your panties. Do not be fooled, you won’t be getting a text tomorrow.
4. He’s rude or talks badly about every woman he sees.This is a huge sign of a total jerk that frequently goes unrecognized. Girls perceive this negative talk as a sign that their guy doesn’t want anyone but them. That’s not the case. If he’s disrepecting other women, even his ex, chances are he disrespects you behind your back, or directly to you, in ways that you’re not noticing.*Sarah says, “He was misogynistic against every woman….Every girl was a “slut”. [If] a girl had on a lowcut shirt, she was a slut. If a girl was out with a bunch of guys, she was a slut.”
5. He doesn’t like “labels”If he’s not going to DTR (Define the Relationship), then he’s not going to commit. He likes the idea of keeping you and your body around, without the commitment or work that goes into a relationship. This is also a super red flag that he is trying to keep his options open, if you know what I mean.
6. He’s got other girls all over his social media.Don’t be naïve. If he’s constantly liking another girl’s pictures, or snap-chatting another girl, that may be cheating, and no they are not “best friends”.The point is, it’s not okay. Surely, Instagram likes and snapchats are how he used to flirt with you…remember?*Claire tells Her Campus, “My ex boyfriend had a girl from back home on his top friends on snapchat and I didn’t think anything about it until she called him when I was spending the night at 3 in the morning and I recognized her name. He told me that he didn’t know why she was calling and that he hadn’t talked to her in over a year. Clearly that was a lie considering they were best friends. Well he broke up with me swearing it wasn’t because of her and I sh*t you not the next day he had replaced me with her for formal…”
7. He’s not there for you during serious events.If you’re sick, hurt or going through something serious, and he’s not there for you, or conveniently busy, that’s a huge warning sign.
*Ashlea says, “in high school I had to go to the hospital because I had an ovarian cyst. I had passed out while throwing on a wheel in pottery, my boyfriend didn’t come to see me until 7 that night claiming he didn’t know I was there, stayed for an hour and then left, I then found out he had left to cheat on me with a girl from his school’s soccer team.”
*Maria: “he madeout with 2 [of my friends] when I had mono at formal or when [a friend] informed me of all 3 of the girls he’d slept with when we were still together (including another [friend of mine]) or when he slept with my roomate on his friends couch and his friend told my big what happened. His defense for all of that was he thought I cheated on him (I never did).
8. He doesn’t hang around you when you’re at parties together.
This may be the ultimate sign when it comes to guys that need to be kicked to the curb. Check out some of these stories from our readers:*Malory says, “Guy I was seeing freshman year said at a party he was “gonna go pee”, I waited 30 minutes, turns out he left.”
*Katie says, “ I was at a party with my ex and left and he thought it was smart to cheat on me with all five of my closest friends still at the party in his truck with a 15 year old. They all caught him, surrounded his truck, and he tried to say that him and that girl were just taking a nap…”
9. He becomes controlling or accuses you of cheating all the time.
If he’s super jealous, always looking over your shoulder, or accusing YOU of doing the wrong, there’s a problem.
*Sarah told us later, “He hated me calling my family. He would do everything he could to make sure I didn’t call my mom, [usually] I call her on average, three times a day…I spent every night with him and only partied around him. He liked having control of every aspect of my life.”If he becomes overly controlling, aggressive, or worse, abusive please get help. Do not feel like you are trapped, this is definitely a sign he’s not worth your time.Please call 1-800-799-7233 for help if you’re in an abusive situation, or visit www.thehotline.org for more help.(Preach LC)
10. You’re not a priority.If you’re going to be seriously involved with someone, you should never come last. This is straight up demeaning to your self-worth, and can wear on your confidence like nothing else. If you’re tired of waiting around, if you’re tired of coming last and being let down, it’s time to drop him like it’s hot.