As the dreaded February 14th arrives, most girls are anxiously biting their nails and doing some strategic wishing for the dreaded holiday. But Valentine’s Day isn’t just one sided. Oftentimes guys, too, are pressured to come up with extravagant surprises for their signficant others, or are just plain confused on what to do. From cheap prepackaged chocolates, flowers to a romantic weekend getaway, the options are endless. But sometimes we can get caught up on what our boyfriend got us, instead of why. It’s common knowledge that some women will compare boyfriends with how much they spend or the gifts they give and this importance gets repeated all over television and movies. But just remember that there doesn’t have to be a perfect date. Valentine’s Day is just a holiday where you celebrate the existing love in your relationship.
Below are three basic thoughts that have probably gone through your head at some point or another. But maybe hear our explanations before you make any hasty judgements.
“Why didn’t he surprise me with something original like a romantic midnight boat ride?”
He probably didn’t know that you wanted one. Guys often complain that women expect them to read their minds. But after being in a relationship for more than a couple months, you should probably have some idea of what your girlfriend is expecting for Valentine’s Day. No, it’s not completely crazy that you know at least something about your partner. That being said, your Valentine’s Day plans don’t have to be a complete surprise to you. If you’re scared your boyfriend will mess up, make your plans together to ensure that the both of you have a great time.
“Why didn’t he get me anything?”
If you tell guys you don’t want anything, chances are that they won’t read too deeply into it. They’re not going to know that “Valentine’s Day is stupid and don’t get me anything” is code for “I need pearls or else.” If you want something for Valentine’s Day, tell him!
“Does he expect sex in return?”
If our culture tells women to expect fine dining and chocolate on V-day, it tells men to expect some passionate sex. “If he gives your pearls, does that mean you give him a lap dance?” This is another flaw with our thinking around this “holiday.” So as said before, this problem is why it’s good to discuss what each of you expect from Valentine’s Day.
You might expect lots of surprises from him, but what if you surprised him with a romantic day of fun? Take it on yourself! It might feel strange at first but it can be really satisfying to plan something that both of you will enjoy! Why let him have all the fun?
Its always a good rule of thumb to expect college aged men are pretty much clueless about what you really want for Valentine’s Day. That’s why honest communication is usually your best bet.