How many things you didn’t want to do or couldn’t do you ended up doing just because you were not able to say no? I bet that has happened a lot. It can happen for many reasons such as: wanting to please others, feeling obligated, not wanting to be judged, having fear of being rejected, wanting to be accepted and liked by others, not wanting to hurt other people ‘s feelings, finding it’s “easier” than confrontation, feeling the need to help others and so on…. We keep agreeing to things we are NOT required to do. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying being agreeable is a bad quality, but it can surely become one if it gets out of control and in the way of our happiness.
NO. Saying “no” is not a bad word, but many people are afraid to do so. That’s why I’ve decided to write about some of the reasons we should start saying it more often. The first reason being: you have a choice. There are many things in life that we have no control over,but we are entitled to decide over the things we do have a choice on. The second reason is, because setting boundaries is healthy. Anna Taylor once said “Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how to use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and will not accept.”
Another reason to say NO is to validate yourself. When you say “no” because you don’t want or can’t do something, or just because you are not ok with it, you are not just disagreeing with someone else, you are agreeing with yourself. Sometimes we forget how important it is to take care of ourselves and put as much effort into making ourselves happy as we do with others. You’re responsible for yourself. Take care of you! Last but not least, it’s ok if others don’t like you or even if they get mad at you. People’s opinions can be so important for some individuals, that they often compromise their happiness, health and even freedom in order to please others. You need to know that your value, self-esteem and self acceptance doesn’t come from other people. What you have to say is important, too.
You have a voice. Speak up!