Changing my relationship towards was one of my main goals this year. I had read about the concept of “changing your relationship with money” thrown around in wellness magazines and heard it in podcasts. I knew I wanted to do it but I honestly did not know where to start.
Truth is, I did not think a lot about my relationship towards money before. After all, talking about how much you make or about your spending habits are not hot topics of conversation here in Puerto Rico. Money, in a lot of circles, is a taboo topic.
However, last year, I did start noticing that when I thought about how I was spending my money some feelings of guilt and shame came up. Then, I started noticing that money handling made me feel stressed out sometimes. Questions started to pop up: “Will I have enough money for the things I may need in the future? Should I spend on this? How much should I be saving? When am I going to be debt free #studentloans? How do you build and stick to a budget? Can I move by myself?” Suddenly, my relationship with money was all I could think about.
We deal with money on a daily basis and after starting to think about my relationship to money, I started feeling antagonized by it! I started feeling afraid of my own capacity to be a good administrator of my money and I realized I was living from a place of scarcity. Something needed to change.
So, like all serendipitous moments in life, I saw this “21-Day Money Mentality Challenge” (for $21 bucks no less!) and I signed up! I was ready to dive deep and learn from an experienced coach. This is what happened:
- I learned that money is just energy. It’s just one of the means available to us to get the things we want or manifest our dreams. And just like any other type of energy, we can either allow the flow of money or block it. I learned that fear, doubt, drama addiction, need for control, and the scarcity mentality are money energy blockers. I learned that trust, confidence, allowing, feeling safe and taken care of, and the abundance mentality are money flow openers.
- I realized I was blocking the flow of energy. The kind of thought I was consciously and unconsciously thinking created my fear-ridden reality. I was constantly saying things like “I have no money for this” or “I’m broke”. I would joke around with “you know that #poorlife”. Even writing that makes me feel ashamed. I was not appreciating all of the goodness and abundance in my life. It was a negative feedback loop.
- Affirmations are powerful. I affirm my reality with the things I think and say. Thus, I changed how I operate by bringing in new and powerful affirmation for wealth and prosperity. These simple positive phrases work great to interrupt my habitual scarcity thought pattern.
- You do not have to have a lot of money to feel and live a prosperous life. This was a game changer for me, I felt so “bad” at handling my money. Our coach told us that we were already prosperous. She had us think and write down all of the things we have accomplished and done in our lives with the resources we had. We were told that abundance is not just the money we have but the money we’ve had, the gifts we have received, and the unforeseen windfall of resources. My list was long and I was surprised.
- I still have a long way to go. This 21-Day challenge was a great starting point to identify the things I need to work on but I am not completely out of the scarcity mentality yet. There are days I get afraid and go back to the same old thinking patters. There are days anxiety and doubt creep in. It is a continuous learning experience but I am committed to healing my relationship to money.
How about you? Are you ready to start this conversation with yourself or others?