Freshman year rolls in and before it’s half over you start to ask yourself whom have I really met this year? There are five types of guys you will, without a doubt, meet during your freshman year. They are as listed: elevator guy, the stage 5 clinger, the know-it-all, the “cool” kid, and lastly the token immature one.
Let’s begin with elevator guy. This is the guy that is always on the elevator whenever you get in. He’s always all smiles and trying to chat you up. At the beginning of the year this is cute because hey who doesn’t love constant attention from a boy? Then things get weird… Elevator guy is a strange creature who never leaves his nest (the elevator.) His intentions are somewhat harmless but nonetheless creepy and annoying. Maybe it’s because that cheesy smile is permanently plastered to his face but eventually you will find it more and more acceptable to meet his personal inquiries with a half-hearted shrug.
Secondly, there is the stage-five clinger, the guy you just can’t get rid of. This is the kid you met at your first swap or party and since then he has never stopped texting you. The stage-five clinger will Facebook chat you every time you log on. If you’re constantly changing your status to offline in an attempt to throw him, chances are you’re a victim of a clinger. This kid probably grew up with the same people his whole life and is thrilled to meet new girls. It just happens that you are one of the first people he met in college, so, he’s stuck like glue.
Then we’ve got the know-it-all. This is the boy in one of your classes who raises his hand and has something to say about everything. There is always a kid like this in your class… In a lecture hall he will debate with the professor and in small classrooms he will become boastful. Yes, it’s helpful because he answers the teacher’s hard questions and gives you good information that’ll probably be on the test, but he is also just plain annoying. He knows he’s smart, and lets everyone know it.
Have you ever walked into a party and seen a guy surrounded by ladies? This is the cool kid, the kid who acts genuinely interested in anything with nice legs and a pretty smile. At first he seems like the dream guy, and maybe you even bumped into him on the quad during a spontaneous snowball fight and had a good laugh but beware. All your friends know him, and you can bet he knows all your friends. This kid will text you back religiously for a week but unless you’re up for partying every night he will get bored and stop responding. Don’t fret—he isn’t worth your (or anyone else’s) time.
Lastly, we have the immature “dude.” I always find a kid like this running down the hallways or hanging out in the lobby. Yes, he is a nerd, but that’s not what makes him so strange. My theory is that this kid didn’t have many friends in high school and acted more like a hermit then a teenager. The thing about college though is there are hundreds of people just like you and you’re likely to find them freshman year. So, the immature “dude,” finds a posse and they become inseparable. This leads to an immediate need for high school immaturity that was so long repressed. I have stepped into the elevator as giggling boys ran out only to find one of them thought it was funny to pee in the elevator because his mom isn’t here to scold him. A “Happy Monday!” to me personally from none other than the immature “dude.”
So if you’re almost ready to call it quits on college guys forever, or if you’re just plain sick of these freshman boys’ shenanigans, don’t worry. Sophomore year will be better. Hopefully, these boys will grow up over the summer and realize the error in their ways, but then again, maybe they won’t. One thing I do know though is that by then you will know how to handle them as long as you know who to look out for. That nice guy in your econ class is pretty cute and chances are that the partying and one-night stand lifestyle will have run out of his system come next August. So don’t lose hope. And until then, maybe it’s time to start taking the stairs.
Photo Credit: