In today’s society, women, especially young girls, are ridiculed for being too feminine. A girl that falls into any female stereotype – even something as simple as liking the color pink – can be judged and seen as inferior. Because of this, young girls are conditioned into thinking that being themselves is wrong.
I am no stranger to this feeling. In middle school I threw out everything pink I owned, I judged any girl wearing the slightest bit of mascara, and tried to rid anything stereotypically female about myself because I had come to believe that being too feminine meant being weak. Girls, of course, are allowed to not be feminine, if that is who they are. But it was not who I was, it was who I thought I had to become to be liked and successful.
Antifeminine culture is very common all through our society, targeted towards women of any age. Young girls are seen as a joke to not only young boys but even grown men for gushing over the latest boy band. Teenage girls are shamed for dressing up to go to class for trying too hard, but judged when they dress down for not trying enough. Grown women with careers and families are criticized by work associates for wearing too much makeup, but are seen as unprofessional when they do not. We live in a world where we are expected to apologize for being a female no matter if we are feminine or not. Society should encourage girls to love anything they want to love, whether it is baseball or Barbie, or both, but girls are rather constantly discouraged. The answer to this absurd culture is for girls to embrace who they are, unapologetically. Whether you adore pink or it just isn’t your color, show the world the kind of girl you are. Do not apologize for loving Taylor Swift or One Direction. Do not apologize for treating yourself to a Pumpkin Spice Latte. Do not apologize for watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians on the couch for hours with your best girlfriends. Do not apologize for wearing that new really glittery eyeshadow you got at Sephora today, even if you are pairing it with an XL t-shirt and Nike shorts.
Another important way to rid society of these seemingly unshakeable standards is to surround yourself with people, female or not, who accept you as you are and empower you to always be your best self. Finding my best friends in high school, and then even more amazing friends in college has helped me discover who I am, and I’m learning to show myself to the world without hesitation. Girls are intelligent, strong, vulnerable, passionate and so much fun, but they are so often torn down. So find your people, wear that pink lipstick, listen to that One Direction song, watch that rom-com that you’ve seen a thousand times, or don’t – but never stop being unapologetically female.
Photo by Irene Dávila on Unsplash